IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The best way to reduce poverty in developing countries is by giving up to 6 years of free education, so that they can at least read, write and use numbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some
people
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 think that the best way to slow down poverty in a country which is still developing
,
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apply
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 is by reducing the years at public
school
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. By doing so, they will learn just the basic knowledge
such
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 as reading and writing. I strongly disagree with
this
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 view
,
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apply
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 and the reasons why I have another opinion will be discussed in
this
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 essay. First of all, one of the reasons why I’m against
this
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 view is that
education
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 is one of the most powerful ways to overcome poverty.
In other words
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,
education
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 is the most powerful tool to fully succeed as a society at large. To give an example, children who are able to complete all the stages of
education
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, from
pre-schools
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pre-school
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 to university, will be able to become successful workers.
Education
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 will allow them to elevate themselves by giving
all
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them all
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 the knowledge they need, and they will be
also
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 capable of living a fulfilling life.
Secondly
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, stopping to study at a certain age when students have just learnt to read and write may increase the number of crimes. The
school
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 is a crucial environment where children are occupied and are guided by their teachers.
Therefore
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 If they go to work early, the risk of being influenced by negative
people
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, in
order
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 to make more money, may be higher than staying at
school
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 and
keep
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learning in
order
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 to become an independent person.
To conclude
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, I firmly disagree with those
people
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 who think that reducing
years
Correct article usage
the years
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 at
school
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 will help the country to develop faster, because it’s much better
giving
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to give
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 more time to study to the future generation in
order
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 to allow them, one day, to be successful
people
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 who are knowledgeable enough to help to develop their countries. As I mentioned previously,
education
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 is vital for all human beings in
order
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 to grow,
firstly
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 as an individual and
secondly
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 as a whole society and
also
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 without
it
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it,
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 the rate of crimes may increase, causing a lot of issues
to
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for
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 the community who have to deal with these alarming problems.

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task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your ideas. Including concrete examples can strengthen your argument and make the essay more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and transitions smoothly between points. This can help enhance clarity and coherence.
task achievement
Avoid repeating ideas and ensure your argument is fully developed in each section. Aim to explore the topic from different angles to enrich the content.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion, which present a logical flow of ideas.
task achievement
The writer has clearly stated their position on the topic and provided strong arguments to support their viewpoints.
task achievement
The essay discusses the importance of education in combatting poverty, which is relevant and well-aligned with the topic.
Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Poverty alleviation
  • Basic literacy
  • Numeracy skills
  • Socio-economic development
  • Sustainable education
  • Universal access
  • Public policy
  • Employment opportunities
  • Quality of education
  • Infrastructure
  • Holistic approach
  • Fiscal challenges
  • Educational reforms
  • Global initiatives
  • Human capital
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