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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The values we gain from our parents and family have more influence over our future success than any skills or knowledge learned in school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#values #gain #parents #influence #future #success #skills #school
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It is believed that the values that children acquire at home from their families are more important than the ones learnt at educational centres. From my point of view, success in life is determined by a combination of values taught by parents and skills developed at school. Researchers have found that babies are like sponges, which means they are always absorbing new information, in the same way, they copy almost everything they see.
Furthermore
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, the younger they are, the easier they learn. Nowadays, a great portion of the population spends most of their time with their families rather than at school or socializing anywhere else.
Consequently
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, parents may be aware of what they are teaching them. Each family has its own way of living and thinking, providing unique and valuable information that will define its children.
On the other hand
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, teachers are providing a wide range of educational resources to each child.
As a result
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, every student will end up acquiring the same skills. Even though
this
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 knowledge is essential for their daily lifestyle and future, it is not as special as the one provided at home. In short, I strongly agree that what we learn in the bosom of our homes is more valuable for our future than what we could possibly study anywhere else.
However
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, it is fundamental to have different sources of knowledge so as to succeed in life.
Submitted by lusitusi:) on

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relevant specific examples
To strengthen your argument, it would be beneficial to include more specific examples or evidence that illustrate how family values and school education contribute to success.
supported main points
Ensure that each main point is thoroughly developed and supported with appropriate evidence or examples. This would ensure a more convincing response to the essay question.
introduction conclusion present
The essay effectively presents a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames the argument nicely.
complete response
You clearly express your viewpoint, addressing the essay prompt effectively. The essay also acknowledges both influences in its discussion, which demonstrates a balanced approach.
logical structure
Logical progression of ideas is maintained throughout the essay, making it easy to follow your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • instilled
  • emotional intelligence
  • resilience
  • perseverance
  • theoretical
  • irreplaceable
  • long-term success
  • professional world
  • life's challenges
  • moral values
  • decision-making
  • support system
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