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Band 4.5

The chart below illustrates which of 3 fast food retaurant were the most preffered amonst the tenagers in Vietnam and Indonasia in 2017 and the predeiction for 2027.

The chart below illustrates which of 3 fast food retaurant were the most preffered amonst the tenagers in Vietnam and Indonasia in 2017 and the predeiction for 2027.
#food #retaurant #amonst #tenagers #vietnam #indonasia #predeiction
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The given four pie charts portray which of
3
Correct article usage
the 3
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fast food restaurants were the most liked by
teenagers
Use synonyms
 in
Vietnam
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 and
Indonesia
Use synonyms
 in the year 2017 and the predictions for 2027.
Overall
Linking Words
, in the year 2017, the most preferred restaurant among
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Vietnamese
teenagers
Use synonyms
 was Burger King,
while
Linking Words
 in
Indonesia
Use synonyms
,
McDonald
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's was the most preferred restaurant among
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
teenagers
Use synonyms
. In 2027, in both
Vietnam
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 and
Indonesia
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,
McDonald
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's will be the most preferred restaurant among
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
adolescents
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. In the year 2017, in
Vietnam
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, 52.8 % of
teenagers
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 preferred Burger King,
while
Linking Words
 in
Indonesia
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, only 15.4 % of
teenagers
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 preferred Burger King.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in
Vietnam
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, 43.1% of
teenagers
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 preferred
McDonald
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's,
while
Linking Words
 in
Indonesia
Use synonyms
,
Use synonyms
Mcdonald's
Correct your spelling
McDonald's
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 was preferred by 60.8 % of
adolescents
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. Only 4.1 % of Vietnamese
adolescents
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 preferred
KFC
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,
while
Linking Words
, 23.8 % of Indonesian
adolescents
Use synonyms
 preferred
KFC
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. In 2027,
McDonald
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's will be the most preferred
restaurants
Fix the agreement mistake
restaurant
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 for both Vietnamese and Indonesian
teenagers
Use synonyms
 because 57.4% and 48.5% of
teenagers
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of
Change preposition
in
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 these two countries respectively will prefer
McDonald
Use synonyms
's.
While
Linking Words
 only 6.3 % of
teenagers
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 will prefer
KFC
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 in
Vietnam
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, and 39.2 % of
teenagers
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 will prefer
KFC
Use synonyms
 in
Indonesia
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by rahman_rehana on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words teenagers, vietnam, indonesia, mcdonald, adolescents, kfc with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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