Some people believe that to become successful in sports one should have a natural talent. Others think that practice is a crucial part to success. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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In modern society, it is often
aruged
Correct your spelling
argued
that a natural talent for sports can become victorious
while
practice
is a significant part
to be
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of being
show examples
perfect. From my perspective, the latter is more plausible but both of
two
Correct article usage
the two
show examples
issues will be examined in
this
essay.
To begin
with, I accepted that natural talent should be considered rapidly for success in sports since some people have already
proved
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proven
show examples
it about innate ability. First of all, natural talents are deeply associated with genetics.
For example
, Rick Flare,
who
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apply
show examples
used to play as a
sport
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sports
show examples
player
in wrestling. He are being memorized until now as he won a gold
metal
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medal
show examples
in many matches. Nowadays, his
daugther
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daughter
, Charlotte Flare,
are
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is
show examples
also
an astounding
player
like her father.
As a result
, the Flares are anniversed by the general public in the United States.
Acoording
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According
to
this
example, We can
recognized
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recognise
show examples
that genetics have an effective connection between parents and children.
On the other hand
, I am convinced that
practice
should be considered significantly because efforts never cheat people. First of all,
practice
has been
proved
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proven
show examples
by athletes. There are so many examples around the world. Among them, in South Korea, Son Heung
min
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Min
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is
the
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a
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well-known football
player
who belongs to Tottenham
that
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which
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is one of the most definitely
favorite
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favourite
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football
team
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teams
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. When he was younger, he
is
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was
show examples
not heavily focused
on
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apply
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but he always tried his best to be the best football
player
. he has proved himself and he could become the best
player
.
Additionally
, natural talents are not received by ancestors.
For instance
, Elon Musk
who
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apply
show examples
is the most famous and intelligent individual in the world since he has manufactured some considerably
astonish
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astonishing
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inventors
such
as rockets and automatic
paying
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payment
show examples
system
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systems
show examples
on
Internet
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the Internet
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to make the world better. Unfortunately, his offspring is not smart unlike him.
In other words
, natural talents are not given and it is made people's efforts. In conclusion, if
inidividuals
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individuals
want to be successful in all parts,
practice
Add an article
the practice
show examples
would be
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
strongly required and efforts should not be underestimated.
Submitted by Rndlrdl on

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grammar
Improve sentence structure and grammar. Some sentences are awkwardly formed or contain errors, like 'Rick Flare, who used to play as a sport player in wrestling. He are being memorized until now...' These can be refined for better clarity.
relevance
Clarify ideas more explicitly. For example, the transition from sports talents to mentions of Elon Musk is abrupt. Ensure the relevance of all examples is clear in context.
development
Develop more balanced arguments. The essay covers both sides but could delve deeper into each perspective to enhance depth of analysis.
structure
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, summarizing the central argument effectively.
examples
The examples of famous individuals (Rick Flare, Charlotte Flare, Son Heung-min) add authenticity and support to the claims.
perspective
Efforts and practice are emphasized well as key components of success, which aligns with your final stance on the issue.
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