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Band 7

the chart below shows information about students studying in 6 main subjects at a US university in 2010.

the chart below shows information about students studying in 6 main subjects at a US university in 2010.
#information #students #subjects #university
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The bar chart compares the numbers of males and females attending 6 different courses at a university in the US in 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, for both
men
Use synonyms
 and women, finance was the most popular subject,
whereas
Linking Words
 engineering was the least. Gender-wise,
while
Linking Words
 male students were more interested in logical courses
such
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 as mathematics and economics, their
counterpart
Fix the agreement mistake
counterparts
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prefered
Correct your spelling
preferred
 marketing and accounting, which require communication skills and carefulness. The numbers of
men
Use synonyms
 and women studying Finance were the same as each other, around 230.
In
Change preposition
On
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contrary
Correct article usage
the contrary
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, only more than 50 female students enrolled in Engineering, which was marginally lower than that of
men
Use synonyms
. Meanwhile, about 120 females took part in the Marketing class, in comparison with only around 80 males.
Similarly
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, the number of females taking accounting classes was 200, which was 30 more than the other group.
In contrast
Linking Words
, there were 200
men
Use synonyms
 attending Mathematics, which was almost 4 times larger than the figure of 60 women. Regarding Economics, the number of male students was
as
Change preposition
apply
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2 times
as
Change preposition
apply
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that of the opposite gender, which
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 150 and 75 respectively.
Submitted by ieltsamiedu on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words men with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "numbers of" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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