IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

You use the local swimming pool often, and during one of your visits, you have encountered a problem.Write a letter to the manager.In your letter describe what the problem was tell what the swimming pool staff have done about it suggest your own solution to the problem.

#pool #visits #manager #staff
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Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing
you
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to you
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 to express my dissatisfaction
about
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with
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 the state of swimming pools.I have been
member
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a member
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 of your club for more than 5 years and I always had
the
Correct article usage
a
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 good experience.
However
Linking Words
,
last
Linking Words
 week I wanted to use the pool around 9pm and as soon as I got in
water
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the water
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 I felt something touching my foot and figured out there was a piece of plastic object. Fortunately, I did not get injured. I believe staff checks the pool on a daily basis and seems like it may not be enough. People trust you with their life and letting
this
Linking Words
 kind of objects in water can have negative consequences later.There should be more
strick
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strict
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 regulations applied on the use of pools. Members should leave all their stuff in lockers and get fined when they do not follow rules. I hope my concern will be taken into consideration to achieve higher customer satisfaction and prevent any issues which may endanger human life and health. Best regards, Laman
Submitted by laman.nazarovaa on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure all sentences follow logically with clear connections between ideas to improve logical structure.
task achievement
Be specific and detailed about the actions taken by pool staff to improve task achievement.
task achievement
Overall, the letter addresses the issue, the actions taken, and suggests a solution - effectively covering all task requirements.
suitable writing tone
The letter maintains a polite and respectful tone throughout, which is suitable for a letter of complaint.
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