Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

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Some people think that young people spend most of their time on their smartphones.
This
essay will discuss how we can help prevent
internet
addiction in our
children
and find the positive and negative sides of
this
problem. On the one hand, gadgets have become a part of daily life in almost all countries.
For instance
, the
internet
can help to communicate with friends or family wherever you are through video calls, social networks, chats, messengers, etc.
Moreover
, there are a lot of educational materials and applications to help
children
learn. A modern child can choose to study without leaving home. A large number of different courses,
such
as language courses, programming courses online university education, etc. It has usefulness in any way for help youngsters.
On the other hand
, some
children
are addicted to their smartphones.
For example
, online games and online gambling are the main cause of disconnect from their families or friends. Youngsters who spend a lot of time on the
internet
are losing their communication skills.
Furthermore
,
internet
bullying, viewing of inappropriate content, fake news, and deceiving others., etc. are destroying the psyche of the younger generation.
Therefore
, parents should monitor and control how their
children
use phones. In conclusion, there are many benefits and disadvantages to using modern devices among young people. But it is
also
necessary to teach
children
how to use it correctly to avoid negative consequences.
Submitted by aldiyarov.e on

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coherence cohesion
Enhance logical structure by ensuring each paragraph develops a single idea clearly, making transitions between ideas smoother.
task achievement
Develop your main points further with specific examples that directly relate to issues discussed. This enhances the clarity and relevance of the specific examples.
task achievement
Focus on balancing the discussion between the positive and negative aspects more evenly to provide a complete response.
coherence cohesion
The essay includes an introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame the discussion.
task achievement
The essay acknowledges both positive and negative aspects of smartphone use, indicating a balanced perspective.

Your opinion

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If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • smartphones
  • usage
  • technology
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • entertainment
  • gaming
  • social media
  • communication
  • educational resources
  • addiction
  • dependence
  • negative effects
  • physical health
  • mental health
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