Art is considered an important part of our society as well as an expression of its culture. Do you think it is important for children to be taught art? Do you think children should be encourged to focus on art rather than other subject.
Art
is an important part of civilization since it reflects its culture. We could dive into one's character through his art
since his pieces are reflections of his soul. Therefore
I think, it is important for children
to study art
at some points
Fix the agreement mistake
point
of
their life. Change preposition
in
However
, I do not encourage children
focusing
only on Change the verb form
to focus
art
rather than other subjects. This
essay will discuss my arguments.
To commence with, studying art
will be beneficial for children
. They can express their feelings through art
. They can also
train their craftmanship
by making artworks Correct your spelling
craftsmanship
such
as sculptures, paintings, and music compositions. Moreover
, they can sharpening
their understanding Change the verb form
sharpen
be sharpening
on
people and Change preposition
of
Correct article usage
the enviroment
enviroment
by enjoying Correct your spelling
environment
artworks
. As an example, I learned to play Fix the agreement mistake
artwork
piano
when I was in elementary school. Even though I Change the article
the piano
do
not become a professional pianist, Verb problem
have
but
until today I play piano to express my emotions. Correct word choice
apply
Therefore
, I agree that studying art
is very fruitful for children
.
However
, I do not think it is productive for children
to focus on art
alone and to leave other subjects,
unless they want to be an artist. Remove the comma
apply
Art
are ingridients
, not the main course for people to live. Correct your spelling
ingredient
While
other subjects such
as science is
important to Change the verb form
are
develop
communities, Wrong verb form
developing
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
needs
a little touch of culture. Correct subject-verb agreement
need
For example
, a doctor has studied in medical school to cure people. With additional knowledge in art
, he will have the
more Correct article usage
apply
sensitivites
when dealing with patients.
Correct your spelling
sensitivity
To conclude
, studying art
is good for children
in order to equipt
Correct your spelling
equip
his
main profession in the future with sensitivities. Correct pronoun usage
their
However
, unless he plans to be an artist, there is no need for children
to focus only in
Change preposition
on
art
. I, personally experienced that art
enriched my life. Hence
, I encourage children
to learn culture since
Change preposition
from
early
years.Correct pronoun usage
their early
Submitted by edna.c.pattisina on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that topic sentences clearly indicate the main point of each paragraph, and that each paragraph focuses on one central idea.
task achievement
Clarify your stance in the introduction to provide a clear thesis statement that guides your essay's argument.
task achievement
The essay provides clear examples from personal experience, such as learning to play piano, which support the argument for teaching art to children.
coherence cohesion
A well-structured conclusion that summarizes the main arguments and provides a final opinion, reinforcing the essay's main points.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.