IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience Write at least 250 words.

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The environment faces numerous challenges, and opinions differ on the most critical issue. Some believe that the loss of
species
 of plants and animals is the main concern,
while
 others argue that broader problems like
climate
change
 and
polution
Correct your spelling
pollution
 are more urgent. Both perspectives have merit and deserve consideration. The
exinction
Correct your spelling
extinction
 of
species
 significantly impacts ecosystems and humanity. Every
species
 plays a role in maintaining ecological balance.
For example
, the decline in bee populations threatens pollination, which is vital for growing fruits and vegetables. Without pollinators, agriculture and food security would suffer globally. Protecting
species
 is essential to ensure
biodieversity
Correct your spelling
biodiversity
 and the stability of ecosystems.
However
, broader environmental problems, like
climate
change
, are
consideared
Correct your spelling
considered
 more pressing by others.
Climate
change
 causes rising sea levels, extreme weather, and habitat destruction,
afecting
Correct your spelling
affecting
 both humans and wildlife.
For instance
, the melting Arctic ice endangers polar bears and contributes to global flooding. Addressing
climate
change
 directly reduces these risks and protects numerous
species
 simultaneously.
Submitted by i.nureddinn on

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task achievement
Consider providing a clear conclusion to summarize your arguments and state your personal standpoint on the issue.
coherence
Ensure consistent use of linking words and phrases to enhance logical flow between sentences and paragraphs.
coherence
Double-check for spelling errors and slight grammatical issues (e.g., "exinction" should be "extinction", "considared" should be "considered").
task achievement
The essay effectively addresses both viewpoints of the topic, discussing the significance of species loss and broader environmental issues like climate change.
task achievement
The examples provided, such as the role of bees in pollination and the impact of melting Arctic ice on polar bears, are relevant and illustrate key points well.
coherence cohesion
The introduction is clear and sets up the discussion well, while each paragraph points logically to the next, maintaining good flow.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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