Many children no longer read books and instead spend their time using modern technology. While some people think this is a positive trend, others think it is a problem. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#children #books #time #technology #people #trend

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There is no denying that modern hi-tech has transformed people’s lives, especially

children

’s.

While

some argue that

children

’s over-reliance on

technology

offers more benefits than reading books, others believe it is a serious global concern.

This

essay will examine both perspectives and express my opinion. On one hand,

technology

plays a pivotal role in fostering digital literacy and enhancing practical

skills

For example

children

can develop their cognitive abilities by utilizing interactive platforms

such

as educational apps and online tutorials. These tools improve problem-solving

skills

and stimulate creativity through engaging activities.

Additionally

technology

facilitates virtual communication, enabling

children

to connect with peers worldwide.

This

interaction broadens their cultural knowledge and strengthens their communication

skills

, preparing them for a more interconnected world.

On the other hand

, excessive screen time poses significant challenges. It often leads to a sedentary lifestyle, increasing the likelihood of chronic health issues

such

as obesity.

Moreover

children

who spend too much time on gadgets may experience reduced attention spans and struggle with knowledge retention, as they miss out on the deeper understanding gained from literary exposure. Over-dependence on devices can

also

result in screen addiction, impairing their confidence in face-to-face communication and hindering the development of crucial social

skills

. In conclusion,

while

technology

offers substantial advantages, I believe

children

should adopt a balanced approach, combining its use with reading books. Proper time management and moderation are key to fostering their intellectual, physical, and emotional development.

Submitted by dr.osamabhb on Fri Dec 13 2024

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task achievement

To further enhance your essay, consider expanding on the examples provided, adding more specific data or studies to support your points. This could strengthen the argument and make the response even more compelling.

coherence cohesion

While the essay is well-organized, consider using more advanced linking devices to add sophistication and variety to the transitions between ideas.

introduction conclusion

The introduction clearly outlines both perspectives of the topic and presents the writer's opinion, offering a clear roadmap for the reader.

supported main points

Each paragraph presents clear and cohesive ideas, with the main points well-supported by relevant examples, contributing to a balanced discussion.

introduction conclusion

The conclusion effectively summarizes the arguments and reinforces the writer’s balanced stance, leaving a strong final impression.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

238 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

interactivity
multimedia resources
educational apps
global connectivity
imagination
critical thinking
attention span
concentration
vocabulary depth
literary knowledge
cultural awareness
digital literacy
conventional reading

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Many children no longer read books and instead spend their time using modern technology. While some people think this is a positive trend, others think it is a problem. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Many products taht we buy are made in other countries. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this phenomenon.

Art classes, such as painting and drawing , are as important to a child's development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Aircraft have been increasingly used to transport fruits and vegetables to some countries where such plants hardly grow or are out of season. Some people consider it a good trend, but some people oppose it. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

In many countries nowadays, more and more women have full-time jobs as men, so there is logic that men and women should share the housework tasks equally. To what extent do you agree or disagree?