Despite better education , some adults are unable to write and read. What are the disadvantages people are having? What should the governments do to avoid this?

#education #adults #people #governments

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The rate of illiteracy is increasing among

adults

even though the education system has already improved.

This

serious

issue

may cause some problems,

such

as social isolation and unemployment, and the

government

should encourage them by involving them in free lessons and motivating them to accomplish their goals with the help of their

parents

. These days, the illiteracy rate among

adults

can be seen as a disaster, as it often brings plenty of difficulties in both their future careers and lives.

Firstly

, the inability to read and write may pose a problem called "social isolation," which makes it very difficult to be a member of a group and do a joint action together. Those who are socially isolated may feel embarrassed and usually suffer from a change in their behaviour

due to

loneliness. Another downside of

that is

job availability. Illiterate

adults

are not eligible to work, leading to financial problems. If they are not capable of working in any field, they have to rely on their family members, causing family matters in the long term in their life-long journey. As for the responsibility of the

government

to mitigate

this

issue

, the

government

should open a way for them by organizing free classes with the help of experienced teachers in every corner of the country, since more time and quality teaching are required for some

adults

As a result

, every person may benefit a lot.

Such

policies even support the

government

to save the budget, as

such

offered classes may come at the expense of less salary rather than the provision of food and housing during their whole life. Being unable to read and write seems a valid

issue

;

however

this

can be tackled by

parents

with ease. In the life of everyone, the role of

parents

is indispensable, and via structured lifestyles and motivation,

parents

can even lift a paralyzed person from a wheelchair.

In other words

, the

government

should use

parents

instead

, helping them to cover expenses as long as they help their children to read and write easily.

Therefore

, lessons by experienced teachers or

parents

can unblock any

issue

through a perfect solution. In conclusion,

while

some

adults

who cannot read and write are facing challenging situations, only by using teachers and

parents

can the

government

successfully overcome

this

serious

issue

Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on Sun Dec 15 2024

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task achievement

Consider providing more specific examples to support your arguments. This will enhance the credibility and relevance of your essay.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that your ideas within each paragraph are logically ordered to enhance cohesion.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion are clear and well-structured, making it easy to understand your viewpoint and summary.

task achievement

You have addressed the task well by discussing both disadvantages and solutions comprehensively.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

384 words

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Despite better education , some adults are unable to write and read. What are the disadvantages people are having? What should the governments do to avoid this?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

The best way to reduce poverty in developing countries is by giving up to six years of free education, so that they can at least read, write and use numbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Governments should spend more money on education than on recreation and sports. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that cell phones should be for personal use only; others, ​however, feel cell phones should be used mostly for work.​ Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that it is important to give gifts to friends and family to show that we care about them. Others think that there are better ways to show that we care. Discuss both views and give your opinion ?

Some people believe that cell phones should be for personal use only; others,  however, feel cell phones should be used mostly for work.    Discuss both views and give your own opinion.