9.Some parents believe that children today spend too much time looking at screens. Others argue that this is necessary in the modern world. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Some
parents
think that
children
in today’s era spend too much
time
in front of the
screen
and don’t go outside as often as before,
while
others believe that
this
is an essential development for the modern world.
Although
the latter opinion has its own merits, I believe that teenagers could benefit from both perspectives if they divided their
time
wisely.
This
essay will discuss both viewpoints and provide my opinion on the matter. On the one hand,
parents
are concerned about the negative impacts of excessive
screen
time
on
the
Change the word
their
show examples
children’s
physical
health
.
Firstly
,
prolongued
Correct your spelling
prolonged
exposure to blue screens can lead to eye strain which is a main contributor to weakened eyesight when growing up to adulthood.
This
is because when teenagers are absorbed in the activities they are doing on the
screen
they tend to lose track of
time
and don’t realize how much
time
has passed, essentially losing awareness of the
time
going by.
Furthermore
, spending too much
time
on the
screen
can negatively affect the
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
social skills and mental
health
. Adolescents who
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
show examples
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
excessive
time
on digital
devices
or on the
internet
tend to have fewer opportunities to engage in
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
meaningful
conversation
Fix the agreement mistake
conversations
show examples
and build strong interpersonal
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because they are primarily spending
time
online rather than
real-life
Change preposition
in real-life
show examples
interactions.
Consequently
, spending an excessive amount of
time
on the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
often leads to a decline
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
children’s
physical
health
and mental
health
.
On the other hand
, there are other
parents
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
are perfectly fine with their
children
spending
time
on the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
as long as it is not unreasonably long.
To begin
with, they believe technology is one of the
key
Change to a plural noun
keys
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
the personal growth of their child. The
Internet
serve
Change the verb form
serves
show examples
as a platform with numerous educational tools and resources that can enhance the child’s insight
of
Change preposition
into
show examples
the world,
this
can contribute greatly to
children’s
personalized growth and development as they can
comes
Wrong verb form
come
show examples
across opportunities for learning anywhere on the
Internet
,
For
instance
Add the comma(s)
instance,
show examples
platforms
such
as Youtube, Coursera, Skillshare,… are excellent examples of learning via the
Internet
.
Moreover
, digital
devices
can serve as a medium of communication for
children
to keep in touch with their
familiy
Correct your spelling
family
families
, they can
also
provide relaxation and entertainment, offering
children
a break from their daily routine and reducing stress. In conclusion, the usage
digital
Change preposition
of digital
show examples
devices
and exposure to screens have
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
pros and cons.
While
it has negative effects on
children’s
physical and mental
health
, it
also
provide
Change the verb form
provides
show examples
benefits regarding personal growth and insights with digital
devices
acting as a platform for learning and relaxing.
Parents
should strike a balance between managing their
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
time
using the
Internet
,
this
will reap the most benefits between the two
Submitted by nphminh0207 on

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