IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

‏Some people think that one of the best ways to solve environmental problems is to increase the cost of fuels for cars and other vehicles. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#‏some #people #cost #fuels #cars #vehicles
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Transportation has become an indispensable part of people's lives. In recent years there has been a frequently discussed issue of whether increasing the cost of
oil
 for buses and cars can contribute to
save
Change the verb form
saving
show examples
 an environmental problem, or whether it poses risks. I firmly agree that increasing fuel prices contributes to decrease health and road problems.
This
 essay will explore
this
 phenomenon in more detail, supported by relevant examples. ‎‏
To begin
, increasing the price of fuel potentially leads to inequality, as not all people will be able to afford to drive their own cars. A report by UNESCO highlights most individuals who earn low salaries are not able to purchase vehicles
due to
 the high cost of
oil
.
Consequently
,
this
 could increase the negative consequences of individuals like theft and crime. ‎‏
On the other hand
, there is a growing preference among the population for
climbing
Verb problem
increasing
show examples
 the rate of
oil
.They think that it is essential to reduce some problems
such
 as traffic jams on the road.
For example
, an American Educational Association survey indicated that 90% of countries which forced their population to pay more money for gas are able to reduce the number of private cars and use other methods
such
 as public transportation So, it boosts a sense of safety and comfort in the street.
Furthermore
, increasing the figure of
oil
 has been linked to solving many well-being issues including encouraging physical activity and reducing environmental degradation.
For instance
, a study conducted by Glasgow University illustrates that when there is a few number of
motor
Fix the agreement mistake
motors
show examples
,
community
Correct article usage
a community
show examples
 definitely can solve environmental issues like declining carbon emissions that exacerbate climate change
that
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 cause air pollution.
Thus
,
this
makes
Verb problem
has
show examples
long-lasting
Correct article usage
a long-lasting
show examples
 impact on people's health. ‎‏‎‏In conclusion,
although
 increasing fuel prices may present certain challenges, I strongly believe it is a necessary step to address pressing issues
such
 as environmental degradation, traffic congestion, and public health. By encouraging individuals to rely more on public transportation and adopt eco-friendly practices, governments can play a pivotal role in ensuring a safer and healthier future for society.
Submitted by 13570581 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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