The chart shows the number of people employed in five types of work on one region of Australia in 2001 and 2008

The chart shows the number of people employed in five types of work on one region of Australia in 2001 and 2008
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The chart shows in Australia five types of work and the number of people employed in it in 2001 and 2008
Overall
, five types of
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
experienced different trends in 7 years
for example
, sales was the most employed farming was the lowest. In 2001 in
sales
Add a comma
sales,
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it was approximately 160,000 employers but in 2008 it rose up to 165,000 if we move to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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accounting it
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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started at 65,000 in 2001 and declined to 55,000 in 2008 the next one is computing it
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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started at 60,000 in 2001 increased to 80,000 in 2008 and after that nursing was 50,000 and 55,000 in 2001 and 2008 and the
last
one is farming it started at 30,000 in 2001 and decreased to 20,000 in 2008.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 90%.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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