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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The pie charts below show the types of media used from 1990 to 2010. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The pie charts below show the types of media used from 1990 to 2010. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#show #media #information #features #comparisons
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Using sorts of media was illustrated from 1990 to 2010 by pie charts. (
intrudation
Correct your spelling
introduction
)
The first
Correct article usage
First
show examples
 of all,
compact
Add an article
the compact
show examples
Use synonyms
disk
Fix the agreement mistake
disks
show examples
 had
Correct article usage
a significantly
show examples
significantly
Change the word
significant
show examples
 proportion in 1990
that is
Linking Words
 55%. Over the years,
this
Linking Words
 percentage rose and reached 95%.
In contrast
Linking Words
, vinyl record and cassette lost their popularity and
withdrawed
Correct your spelling
withdrawn
show examples
 types of media in 2000. There were 3 big sorts that
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
were well-known in 1990. One of them,
compact
Correct article usage
the compact
show examples
disk
Use synonyms
 demonstrated
rising
Correct article usage
a rising
show examples
 number and maintained
own
Correct pronoun usage
its own
show examples
famous
Replace the word
fame
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, other music media types showed
fall
Correct article usage
a fall
show examples
 and disappeared.
According to
Linking Words
 the data, there was a new product
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
called digital audio. Digital audio had
small
Correct article usage
a small
show examples
using
Verb problem
apply
show examples
rating in 2020
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
indicated
Wrong verb form
indicating
show examples
 5%. Its proportion was less
due to
Linking Words
compact
Correct article usage
the compact
show examples
disk
Use synonyms
. Compact
Use synonyms
disk
Fix the agreement mistake
disks
show examples
 kept 95% of
choices
Correct article usage
the choices
show examples
 of consumers, respectively.
Submitted by i.nureddinn on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words disk with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • proportion
  • percentage
  • dominant
  • marginal
  • fluctuate
  • emerge
  • decline
  • increase
  • stability
  • predominant
  • trend
  • shift
  • notable
  • minimal
  • marginalize
  • contrast
  • highlight
  • consumption
  • landscape
  • transition
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