IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The chart and table below give information about tourists at a particular holiday resort in Australia. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart and table below give information about tourists at a particular holiday resort in Australia. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #tourists #holiday #resort #australia #summarise #features #comparisons
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The chart and table show the origins of travellers (Asia, Europe, US, and Other),
their
Change the pronoun
the
show examples
 average length of their stay, and their
preffered
Correct your spelling
preferred
accomodations
Correct your spelling
accommodations
accommodation
 and activities at a specific holiday resort in Australia.
Overall
Linking Words
,
Asians
Use synonyms
 make up the largest group of
visitors
Use synonyms
, though crowds from Europe stay the longest. All four regions
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 distinct preferences, with
Asians
Use synonyms
 and
Americans
Use synonyms
favor
Wrong verb form
favouring
show examples
 hotels and sightseeing,
while
Linking Words
Europeans
Use synonyms
 and other
visitors
Use synonyms
 prefer campsites and water-related activities. It can be seen that Asian travellers account for 37% of
visitors
Use synonyms
, followed closely by
Europeans
Use synonyms
 at 35%.
Americans
Use synonyms
 make up 18%,
while
Linking Words
visitors
Use synonyms
 from other regions comprise only 10%.
Although
Linking Words
Asians
Use synonyms
 are the most frequent
visitors
Use synonyms
, they stay at an average of 7
days
Use synonyms
, compared to
Europeans
Use synonyms
 at 16
days
Use synonyms
,
Americans
Use synonyms
 at 14
days
Use synonyms
, and other
visitors
Use synonyms
 at 10
days
Use synonyms
. In terms of
accomodations
Correct your spelling
accommodations
accommodation
,
Europeans
Use synonyms
 and other travellers prefer camping or caravans,
while
Linking Words
Asians
Use synonyms
 choose 5-star hotels and American opt for 4-star hotels. For activities, sightseeing is most popular among
Asians
Use synonyms
 and
Americans
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
Europeans
Use synonyms
 enjoy sunbathing or swimming. Other
visitors
Use synonyms
 are keen
with
Change preposition
on
show examples
 surfing.
Submitted by bilqissasha on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words asians, visitors, americans, europeans, days with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "stay" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • trend
  • comparison
  • spike
  • drop
  • correlation
  • seasonal variation
  • demographics
  • tourist influx
  • resort
  • holidaymakers
  • visitor statistics
  • notable changes
  • fluctuation
  • steady growth
  • decline
  • peak season
  • off-peak season
  • international tourists
  • domestic tourists
  • external factors
  • economic conditions
  • political climate
What to do next:
Look at other essays: