Obesity has been found to be a serious health hazard the world over, over the past few decades. What are the causes behind it and what are the effects of it on various sections of the community?

this

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day and age, Obesity is considered as most serious

health

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hazard problem that

this

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generation of people has been experiencing over the past few years. The fundamental reason for these issues is because of the food habits and lack of physical activity, which are affecting the entire population. In

this

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following essay, both the causes and effects will be discussed.

Firstly

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, consuming a balanced

diet

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is said to be the most pivotal factor in living a robust life and not getting obese. But many people are not conscious about the choice of intake,

this

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is because of the availability of fast food and the diversity of foodstuff.

Secondly

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, the lack of exercise is another major contributor to life-threatening

health

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-related problems.

This

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due to

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the sedentary lifestyle and technological advancement. As an example, nowadays everything has digitalised where there is no need to commute to another place to meet people or to the workplace.

This

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is because of the work-from-home option and availability of online meeting applications,

consequently

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, pupils are getting lazy because they are not even getting out of their homes. There are some severe consequences

due to

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not following a proper

diet

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such

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as heart disease, and thyroid and it even reduces the life span.

For instance

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, the research conducted by the World

Health

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Organization demonstrated the rate of several diseases caused by unhealthy meals and being overweight.

However

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this

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can be controlled by proper

diet

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and eating healthy and home-cooked

meal

Fix the agreement mistake

meals

show examples

instead

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of eating in fancy restaurants or using instant delivery platforms to order and eat at home .

Similarly

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, lack of physical activity is another main problem which leads to gaining more weight beyond the individual's body mass index.

For example

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, the majority of women are getting serious

health

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issues like PCOD and PCOS. But these affairs can be controlled by involvement in physical activities

such

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as participating in yoga, running or evening dancing. In conclusion, even though there are various major

health

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problems caused because of obesity, there are plausible solutions to overcome these serious issues by following a regular

diet

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and involving in physical activities.

neejamalan0420

Dec 19, 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly to the next by using linking words or phrases effectively.

task achievement

While the essay covers the basic aspects, explore broader repercussions of obesity on social and economic aspects as well, if possible.

language use

Consider diversifying vocabulary to add more variety to the writing.

coherence cohesion

The essay is generally well-organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.

task achievement

Supported arguments with relevant details and examples.

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

354 words

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Obesity has been found to be a serious health hazard the world over, over the past few decades. What are the causes behind it and what are the effects of it on various sections of the community?

Many of the products we buy nowadays break or wear out very quickly. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this for manufacturers and the public?

«Some modern artists receive huge sums of money for the things they create, while others struggle to survive. Governments should take steps to resolve this unfair situation» To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Today more and more tourist are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctica. What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Some people think that only the government can make significant changes in society, while others think that individual can have a lot of influence. What is your opinion?

Nowadays, the differences between countries are becoming less evident because people follow the same media. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?