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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

bicycle is more environmentally friendly than other forms of transport why is it still not popular at many places? what a can be done to increase popularity of cycling ?

#bicycle #forms #transport #places #popularity
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The utilization of
bicycles
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 for daily commutes is still limited in many parts of the world, Despite its benefits to the environment. There are two main factors responsible for the lack of popularity of
bicycles
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 in these places;
However
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, the government can make some implements to encourage more people to adopt
this
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 eco-friendly method of transportation. One main reason why cycling is still not popular in many places is the issues related to the safety of riders. Not only do
bicycles
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 proffer no protection from weather but
also
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 not have designated lanes, leading to potential hazards like snow, high winds and a foggy environment.
Additionally
Linking Words
, cycling could be very time-consuming as compared to travelling by car.
For instance
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, if an individual has to reach work on time with long commutes or inadequate public options, cycling is often seen as less effective than driving a personal vehicle.
However
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, the government can still encourage more people to use
bicycles
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 by integrating cycling with public transport Like racks,
along with
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 providing safe and deliciated cycling infrastructure. By developing an elaborate network of cycle paths and lanes, riding a bicycle will become more comfortable and convenient,
for example
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, the
united kingdom
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United Kingdom
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 was the first country who initiate
this
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 practice and succeeded;
therefore
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, it will gradually result in more journeys being made by bicycle. In conclusion, the lack of popularity of
bicycles
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 can mainly be linked to safety and timing constraints and people cannot be encouraged to switch to
this
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 made until it becomes safer and faster by developing appropriate infrastructures.
Submitted by rajputashutosh0009 on

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task achievement
You have addressed all parts of the task, but providing more diverse examples would strengthen your argument. Try to include specific cases or statistics from various places to support your points more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Consider providing clearer transitions between examples to enhance the logical flow. This will help in connecting your ideas more seamlessly and ensure the reader follows your reasoning easily.
task achievement
Although your response is structured well, further developing each point with additional detail can deepen the content. Expanding on each reason for bicycle popularity issues could add depth to the essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame your discussion well. Good job in summarizing your points effectively at the end.
task achievement
You have identified key issues related to the lack of popularity of bicycles and suggested viable solutions, demonstrating a good understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
The essay is logically structured with separate ideas supporting your main argument. Each paragraph serves its purpose and transitions naturally to the next.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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