In many countries, fast food is becoming cheaper and more widely available. Do the disadvantages of this outweigh the advantages?

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The advent of modern society has attracted many towards changing their diet to
fast-food
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fast food
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because it's inexpensive
as well as
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readily available.
However
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, there are
also
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growing concerns related to
this
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new type of cuisine.
In
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From
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my perspective, there are countless downsides of
such
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food, which are elaborated
in
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on in
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ensuing
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the ensuing
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paragraphs. Several disadvantages can be considered for
fast-food
Correct your spelling
fast food
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. The prominent drawback is
lower quality
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lower-quality
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food. These types of food often
lacks
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lack
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nutrients, essential vitamins,
as well as
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minerals, yet
contains
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contain
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absurd
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an absurd
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amount of calories, sugar and
last
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but not least artificial flavours. For
examples
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example
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,
Coca-Cola
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the Coca-Cola
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drink, which is famous for its
flovour
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flavour
and is enjoyed by many around the globe daily contains more
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then
Replace the word
than
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33% of sugar and 450 calories per 300
mls
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ml
of drink.
Dispite
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Despite
such
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higher calories,
this
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drink does not provide any vital minerals.
In addition
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to that,
fast-foods
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fast food is
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are leading cause behind most health issues that are observed in cutting-edge society.
Obisity
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Obesity
, fatigue, lower IQ level and metabolism rate,
as well as
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lower
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stamina
stemina
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stemina,
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are the most common types of concerns noticed by healthcare professionals in recent times, in someone who relies more on
fast-foods
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fast foods
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. The recent case of a young boy
which
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who
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caught everyone's attention is a perfect example of
this
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.
This
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24-year-old boy was consuming at least two burgers a day for
little
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a little
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over two years and because of
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this
Add a comma
this,
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he had
extremely
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an extremely
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low metabolism rate which led to
obisity
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obesity
and lower
body-stemina
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body-stamina
after eating only burgers for
such
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extensive
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an extensive
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period of time. To cap it all,
presence
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the presence
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of
preservative
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preservatives
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and added artificial flavouring to rapid
the
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apply
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mass production is a significant issue.
Junk-foods
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Junk foods
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are carefully made
in
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with
show examples
Correct article usage
the intentions
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intentions
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intention
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to mass produce and sell quickly in
market
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the market
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eventhough
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even though
it does not have any benefits to
public
Add an article
the public
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.
To conclude
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, Fast-food in recent times are inevitable and
also
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harmful as they are lower in quality,
increase
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increases
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health related
Add a hyphen
health-related
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concerns
as well as
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contains
preservative
Fix the agreement mistake
preservatives
show examples
and artificial flavours.
However
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, all
this
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can be avoided by switching to more traditional and home-made foods, which are not only balanced in
nutritions
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nutrition
show examples
values but
also
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suitable for humans.
Submitted by ruchin27 on

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coherence cohesion
Work on organizing your ideas more clearly to improve logical structure. Consider structuring each paragraph with a clear topic sentence, supporting details, and a concluding sentence.
task achievement
Make sure your examples are directly supporting your main point and are clearly introduced. Additionally, ensure that they illustrate the point you're making without leading to ambiguity.
task achievement
Strive to elaborate your points further and avoid repetition of ideas to enhance comprehension. Make sure every main point is distinctly illustrated along with its implications or examples.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in organizing your ideas.
task achievement
You've provided relevant examples, such as the case study of the boy consuming burgers, which helps in illustrating your points better.
task achievement
Your discussion of potential health issues caused by fast food ties well into the overall argument about its disadvantages.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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