Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
It is believed by some people that professionals should serve their country,
while
others think that paramedics should not be bound and should Linking Words
set
free. people with the former Add a missing verb
be set
opinion
Use synonyms
says
, Correct subject-verb agreement
say
Use synonyms
individuals
should deliver their Correct word choice
that individuals
services
to Use synonyms
their
public, because they Change the word
the
had
learnt everything from from their native country and Wrong verb form
have
had
developed specialised skills by working Wrong verb form
have
on
these people. Change preposition
with
On the other hand
, the latter one's Linking Words
comment
thatFix the agreement mistake
comments
,
professionals should not be restricted, as they Remove the comma
apply
had
spent their own money on their education and if the native region is unable to provide them with excellent employment opportunities, Wrong verb form
have
so
they should be allowed to move anywhere in the world. I will explain both points with relevant examples.
Correct word choice
apply
To begin
with the former Linking Words
opinion
, Use synonyms
individuals
in favour of Use synonyms
this
statement Linking Words
claims
that, engineers and consultants should serve Correct subject-verb agreement
claim
their
public. Because they are the assets of their own countries and governments have assisted them Change the word
the
on
achieving their current positions. Change preposition
in
This
is why they must deliver their Linking Words
services
to locals. To illustrate, South Africa was facing Use synonyms
lack
of healthcare workers and citizens were facing issues, so they restricted Correct article usage
a lack
migration
of paramedical teams out of their state, which ultimately filled the vacant seats and their health sector started flourishing.
Correct article usage
the migration
On the other hand
, the supporters of the latter Linking Words
opinion
Use synonyms
argues
thatChange the verb form
argue
,
Remove the comma
apply
individuals
should not be bound, they should be allowed to migrate Use synonyms
where ever
they wish. Because, if the Correct your spelling
wherever
individuals
did not receive any financial support from the higher officials and the governments are unable to provide the financial security and the basic employment opportunities to the Use synonyms
individuals
Use synonyms
so
they should not restrict them. Correct word choice
apply
Linking Words
Instead
they should facilitate Add a comma
Instead,
these Specialist
to learn from Change the determiner
this Specialist
these specialists
first world
countriesAdd a hyphen
first-world
,
so that in future, these specialists can be asked to provide their Remove the comma
apply
services
to their own communities. Use synonyms
For instance
, China has introduced Linking Words
this
policy, in which they give scholarships to their doctors and sign a contract, by which surgeons, return back to Linking Words
national
country after completing their foreign education. Correct pronoun usage
their national
This
is how their health care has marvellous Linking Words
services
.
Use synonyms
To conclude
, both arguments are valid at some points Linking Words
however
,in my Linking Words
Use synonyms
opinion
the professionals must have the freedom to work in any state they want if they have not been receiving the required status, Add the comma(s)
opinion,
specially
if they Replace the word
especially
had
never received any funds or help from their governments.Wrong verb form
have
Submitted by dr.tehreemk on
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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence. This helps in guiding the reader and improves the overall coherence of the essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Avoid grammatical inconsistencies and ensure smooth transitions between points and paragraphs.
Task Achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your points. This helps in illustrating your arguments more effectively.
Task Achievement
Address potential counter-arguments to strengthen the position and provide a deeper analysis of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, providing an overview of both perspectives and a personal opinion.
Task Achievement
Both views are discussed, providing a balanced response to the task.
Task Achievement
The essay makes an attempt to incorporate examples to support the arguments, like referencing the case of South Africa and China.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.