It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Saving enough
money
for the future
is compulsory for everyone including youngsters. I agree with this
statement Because it leads to a secure and stable future
, could initiate our future
goals, help us to tackle with
Change preposition
apply
future
hurdles and reduce viability on others for money
in need.
On the one hand, Money
plays a vital role in our life. By saving it, we can lead to a secure and settled future
because Situations like health issues, educational issues, financial
Correct word choice
and financial
unstability
can challenge us in any phase of life. To cope Correct your spelling
instability
up
with it, we should save Change preposition
apply
money
for upcoming
phase. Add an article
the upcoming
For instance
, During the Pandemic of Covid -19
, Correct your spelling
COVID-19
Economic
status of Daily wagers fell Correct article usage
the Economic
due to
Correct article usage
the lost
lost
of Replace the word
loss
employments
. Income generation sources were shut down but expenses in Fix the agreement mistake
employment
term
of health, Fix the agreement mistake
terms
basic
Correct word choice
and basic
neccessities
did not stop. So, savings played a significant role Correct your spelling
necessities
to
соре up with that hard time.
Change preposition
in
On the other
Hand
, Fix capitalization
hand
Due to
lack
of savings some people Correct article usage
a lack
trapped
in Add a missing verb
are trapped
debt
system in their hard Correct article usage
a debt
time
with Fix the agreement mistake
times
high
interest rate that makes their conditions Add an article
a high
worst
. To finish the loan, People work hard but sometimes they choose the path of crime to get rid of debt, Correct word choice
worse
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
distress
their mental condition, Change the verb form
distresses
Correct word choice
and promote
promote
a stressful environment around them. Correct subject-verb agreement
promotes
For Instance
, During Covid
- 19 the rate of theft and suicide increased Correct your spelling
COVID-19
due to
their unstable financial condition.
In conclusion, For a secure and well-settled future
, savings can play immense
role Add an article
an immense
the immense
to cope
Change preposition
in coping
up
with hurdles and challenges caused by economic downfall.Change preposition
apply
Submitted by tarnjeet431 on
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task achievement
Try to expand on the reasoning for why saving money is useful for young people, not only in terms of emergencies but also in other aspects like education and investments.
coherence cohesion
Strengthen the logical connections between your arguments to make the essay flow more smoothly.
introduction conclusion
Your introduction clearly sets out your viewpoint and establishes the key arguments for your essay.
task achievement
You provided a relevant example of the pandemic to illustrate your point about financial stability during crises.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite