A lot of money is spent nowadays searching for oil. As the world's oil resources will eventually run out, it would be more logical to spend some of this money on developing new sources of power, such as wind and solar. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Searching and refining
oil
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is an expensive and difficult task.
Due to
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oil
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's limited resources, some argue that some of the
money
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used for
oil
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search should be spent on developing new
energy
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resources. I agree with
this
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statement because power sources like
wind
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and solar offer many long-term benefits. First of all, renewable
energy
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resources provide more sustainability than
oil
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. Power generated through sources like
wind
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and sunlight is much cheaper than
oil
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energy
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, and it is
also
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considered clean
energy
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causing no bad effects on the environment. The unlimited amount of
wind
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and sunlight,
for example
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, is the raw material for solar and
wind
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turbines which is available at no cost.
Therefore
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, renewable
energy
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is much easier to maintain and offers better sustainability in future.
Furthermore
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, the world is moving towards electric vehicles which has decreased the demand for
oil
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in the market.
Due to
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climate change, the amount of electric cars can significantly increase in the coming years. So,
oil
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will become less valuable and a huge amount spent on its search will not provide much benefits.
For instance
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, if a lot of
money
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is spent on
oil
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search and later its value drops
due to
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low demand, it can cause huge losses for
oil
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companies.
Thus
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, spending extra
money
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in the
oil
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industry should be avoided and only necessary amounts of
oil
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should be processed. In conclusion,
although
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oil
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is currently considered an essential element, companies should
also
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focus on developing new sources of power including
wind
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and solar
energy
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. More
money
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should be invested in renewable
energy
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as it is more sustainable and does not exacerbate climate change.
Also
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,
oil
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companies should assess the decreasing
oil
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demand and spend
money
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accordingly
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.
Submitted by mhamza.yahya on

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coherence cohesion
Enhance the use of varied sentence structures to improve flow. Though the essay is generally coherent, more sophisticated linking words and phrases could improve it further.
task achievement
Incorporate more specific examples and data where possible. The examples provided are relevant, but including statistics or case studies could strengthen the argument.
coherence cohesion
The introduction sets a clear stance, and the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points.
task achievement
The essay addresses the task prompt fully, with a strong argument supporting renewable energy over oil.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • finite
  • renewable energy sources
  • expenditure
  • compromise
  • sustainable
  • environmental impact
  • infrastructure
  • economic sustainability
  • dependency
  • fluctuating prices
  • stimulate
  • job creation
  • vested interests
  • transition
  • reluctance
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