There are many reasons that can motivate a person to stay working for the same company. Some believe that money is the main reason. Do you agree or disagree?

#person #company #believe #money #reason

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Firstly

Linking Words

People

Use synonyms

are need

Change the verb form

need

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money to pay for their daily needs like rent, food, and bills, so they stay in a job that pays well

And

Correct word choice

apply

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I see A high salary

allow

Correct subject-verb agreement

allows

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people

Use synonyms

to improve their living standards which

motivate

Correct subject-verb agreement

motivates

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them to stay

Correct your spelling

employed

employess

Correct your spelling

employees

employed

stay often for consistent income to support their families And A supportive boss and kind coworkers make

people

Use synonyms

feel happy and want to stay in my opinion Flexible hours or remote work options can keep employees loyal even if the pay is average

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

For example

Linking Words

Companies that offer extra, money like bonuses or raises,

entourage

Correct your spelling

encourage

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employees to stay longer but

on the other hand

Linking Words

Correct your spelling

Employees

Employess

Correct your spelling

employees

might stay in

Correct pronoun usage

their job

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job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

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because it offers chances for promotion or learning new skills And some

people

Use synonyms

are more likely to stay if they like what they do even if the salary isn't the best Money is important, but it's not the only reason

people

Use synonyms

stay A good balance of salary, job satisfaction, and personal growth opportunities is what really matters

Submitted by Mohammed on Sun Dec 22 2024

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coherence cohesion

Clarify the structure by explicitly separating paragraphs for different points.

coherence cohesion

Add a clear introduction and conclusion to frame the essay.

task achievement

Include specific examples to strengthen arguments.

task achievement

Polish grammar and sentence structure for clearer expression.

task achievement

Addresses multiple perspectives on the reasons for job retention beyond salary.

coherence cohesion

Includes a variety of factors that influence job satisfaction.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

3
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

170 words

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There are many reasons that can motivate a person to stay working for the same company. Some believe that money is the main reason. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people argue that if children behave badly they parent should accept responsibility for the behaviour of children. Do you agree or disagree.

Some people think the money spent on developing technology for space exploration is not justified. However, there are more beneficial ways to spend this money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In several parts of the world, humans live near protected areas that preserve and protect wildlife. what problems could this situation cause? what solutions you can suggest?

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Some educationalists think that international exchange visits will benefit teenagers at the school. To what extent do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?