It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children

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Young ages often misbehave since they tend to follow their intuitions and freedom, which
make
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makes
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them struggle to distinguish right and wrong way. Punishment could be an effective way to
nurture
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encourage
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them to
choose
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make
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good decisions.
Hence
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, I side with the implementation of punishments to them, teaching
how
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them how
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to be responsible by giving them more tasks in reading about positive
behaviors
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behaviours
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. By understanding how to determine a viable choice, children could be more
disclipine
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discipline
disciplined
at early ages, which
also
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shapes their sense of responsibility. They will learn the consequences of choosing a conflicting way that can lead to negative impacts for them.
For instance
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, some elementary students would be reluctant to intentionally skip a class or not obey their teachers because they have known that it is a bad action, which can make them get
punishments
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punished
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or even expelled from the school.
Therefore
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, giving them tasks or more lectures that provide real stories or examples about a bad choice and its implication to their lives could be an alternative.
This
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will thoroughly shape their understanding and awareness about the adverse outcomes of it. To illustrate, making them watch a video about a child who is lazy
and
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apply
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always neglects his assignments
that
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and
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has
terrible
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a terrible
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future since he only has low scores without an excellent reputation, will help them understand the importance of following
a
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the
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right choice. To summarize, I believe the early ages will become more responsible and open-minded if they know the implications.
Thus
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, punishments would play a significant role for them, which deeply
build
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builds
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their perspectives about poor choices in order to prevent them from getting bad futures.
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task achievement
Your essay provides a good response to the task. However, the main argument about the role of punishment could be strengthened by discussing a wider range of positive and negative implications of punishment. Consider exploring both sides of the argument to make your response more comprehensive.
task achievement
Ensure that the examples and arguments are fully developed. The examples provided are relevant but could be more detailed to enhance the reader's understanding. Support each point with specific illustrations or scenarios.
coherence cohesion
Maintain a balanced structure throughout the essay. While coherence is generally strong, transitions between ideas can be made smoother by using cohesive devices more effectively. This will improve the overall flow and connectivity of your essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame the argument effectively. This structure provides clarity to the reader.
coherence cohesion
The main points are logically structured, and arguments are presented in a clear and logical manner. The essay sticks to the main theme without significant deviation, which is commendable.
task achievement
The essay includes relevant examples to support the claims, helping to clarify and reinforce the argument. This helps in making your points more convincing to the reader.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • punishment
  • positive reinforcement
  • consequences
  • time-outs
  • removal of privileges
  • open communication
  • clear expectations
  • consistency
  • fairness
  • disciplinary action
  • proportionate
  • moral values
  • internalization
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