Celebrities make a very good living out of media attention and have chosen to live in the public spotlight. They have no right to complain when they feel the media are intruding on their privacy. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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this

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contemporary epoch, some

individuals

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think that famous people choose to be in the spotlight and enjoy the public view, so they should suffer the consequences. I believe that superstars should . My contention will be

further

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explained. To embark on, not all famous

individuals

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live their

lives

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for fame alone, some of them dedicate their

lives

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to being a good

example

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for others.

In other words

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, if a celebrity is striving to be a good

example

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to influence others, he should not suffer from public backlash or have his private life broadcast. A prime

example

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this

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is Mohamed Salah, the famous football player who not only dedicates a portion of his time to making anti-drug awareness campaigns

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apply

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but

also

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strives to be a good role model.

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, not all famous men and women are only after momentary fame and money, and their private

lives

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should be respected.

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, some immoral journalists or media personnel can take advantage of other famous

individuals

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for their own gain.

This

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means that

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show examples

some journalists could spread false rumours about a well-known media individual for their own fame and gains. A prime

example

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this

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is a survey conducted by Times News Magazines which revealed that celebrities suffer the most from blackmail from corrupted journalists.

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, the private

lives

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of famous

individuals

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should be protected from immoral attacks. In conclusion,

after

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this

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essay has manifested the points mentioned above, it can be reiterated that

while

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celebrities put their

lives

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in public, they need to have a portion of their life for themselves. I believe that no one should intrude on anyone's private life even if they are famous.

kokoelking1Sun Dec 22 2024

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task achievement

Try to state your position more clearly in the introduction. You mentioned 'I believe that superstars should,' but didn't finish the thought. This will provide a more solid foundation for your argument.

coherence cohesion

Ensure smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs to enhance the logical flow of your essay. This will help the reader follow your argument more easily.

task achievement

You used specific examples, like Mohamed Salah, effectively to support your main points, making your argument more convincing.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion effectively bookend your argument, providing a clear starting point and a satisfying conclusion to your discussion.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

276 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Public spotlight
Media intrusion
Social contract
Paparazzi
Ethical limits
Mental health
Privacy rights
Public persona
Harassment
Media scrutiny

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Some species of animals are almost extinct; and many others seem to be fast approaching a similar risk. What are the reasons for this? What should be done to solve this problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

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