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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

You recently organised an all-day meeting for your company, which took place ina local hotel. In their feedback, participants at the meeting said that they liked the hotel, but they were unhappy about the food that was served for lunch. Write a letter to the manager of the hotel. In your letter • say what the participants liked about the hotel •explain why they were unhappy about the food • suggest what the manager should do to improve the food in the future.

#company #place #ina #hotel #feedback #participants #food #lunch #manager #•explain #future
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Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to express my feedback regarding the event held on October 17, 2023, which I attended as a representative of CDC Company. My name is Pardis Ghobadi. First and foremost, I would like to convey that our staff members and other guests were very content and satisfied with the hotel's ambience. The colorful lights, elegant furniture
such
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 as chairs and tables,
as well as
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 the hall decoration, contributed to the
overall
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 success of the event.
besides
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,Many attendees expressed that the hotel is an ideal location for holding ceremonies and meetings.
However
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, I must honestly mention that the provided buffet, comprising lunch, brunch, and beverages, left us somewhat disappointed. The guests were unhappy with the quality and taste of the food, as some dishes were excessively salty and others were not up to par.
moreover
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,I believe that the management should be aware of these shortcomings. I would like to offer some suggestions to prevent
such
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 situations in the future. You could consider implementing a recipe booklet for consistency, changing the head chef, and organizing taste-testing sessions for quality control.
Finally
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,I hope that
this
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 feedback will be useful for your improvements. Best regards, Pardis Ghobadi
Submitted by pardisghobadi on

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task response
The letter addresses all task requirements, but more specific details on the food issues could strengthen the response.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single idea to enhance clarity.
coherence and cohesion
The greeting and closing are appropriately done with a polite tone throughout the letter.
coherence and cohesion
Clear logical structure with separate paragraphs for each point.
task achievement
The tone is appropriate for formal communication with a hotel manager.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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