You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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There is no denying the fact that not all youngsters attend the
university
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
it is
also
Linking Words
possible to say that choosing to enroll in work-based training has become more popular in some nations, there is
also
Linking Words
an argument
opposes
Wrong verb form
opposing
show examples
it.
This
Linking Words
essay will discuss both points of view and express my opinion.
To begin
Linking Words
with, jobs that only require training
are
Verb problem
have
show examples
started to be common and an easy option for young
people
Use synonyms
who want to start their career live rabidly. To elaborate, some companies offer
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
high school graduates a short course in
form
Correct article usage
the form
show examples
of
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
training and after finishing it they will give you a possession immediately.
For example
Linking Words
, Aramco Company offer
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
young
people
Use synonyms
to participate
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
their programs and
offer
Correct subject-verb agreement
offers
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them a high level of medical insurance
along with
Linking Words
monthly
Correct article usage
a monthly
show examples
salary which is considered a dream for the majority of these youngsters. Another point to consider is that attending
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
university
Use synonyms
is beneficial and substantial for any individual but especially for young adults. It is
also
Linking Words
possible to say that, rushing into the adult
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
and obligations
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
may be an irresponsible choice.
In addition
Linking Words
, getting
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
university
Use synonyms
degree will expand their job options.
For instance
Linking Words
, if you get
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
law degree, you will be able to
started
Change the verb
start
show examples
your own law firm or be a consultant in any law
firms
Fix the agreement mistake
firm
show examples
. In conclusion, despite
people
Use synonyms
having different points of view; I tend to believe that it depends on every individual circumstances, but
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
university
Use synonyms
degree will increase the chances
to get
Change preposition
of getting
show examples
various job offers
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
young
people
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by omima7a7md on

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Task Response
Make sure to fully address all parts of the task. Your essay presents both sides, but it could include more development of the disadvantages or counterarguments to balance your discussion.
Coherence and Cohesion
Enhance the logical flow within paragraphs by using more linking words and clear topic sentences. This will make your ideas easier to follow.
Task Achievement
Use more relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience to illustrate your points more effectively. This helps validate your arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clearly present and function well to frame your essay.
Task Achievement
The essay explores the benefits of work-based training with a relevant example from a known company, illustrating one side of the argument effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • enrol in
  • work-based training
  • university education
  • hands-on experience
  • debt
  • financially viable
  • career advancement
  • networking opportunities
  • employability
  • academic qualifications
  • personal growth
  • intellectual development
  • career flexibility
  • critical thinking
  • problem-solving abilities
What to do next:
Look at other essays: