Some people think that museums should be enjoyable places to entertain young people, while others believe that the purpose of museums is to educate. Discuss both view and give your opinion.
Museums
' function is thought to be a leisure form for the young generation Use synonyms
however
others think that their purpose is education. Personally, in Linking Words
this
essay, I shall discuss both sides in more detail before giving my opinion.
On the one hand, some say that Linking Words
museums
should be enjoyable places for the youth to entertain because, in modern life, the development of technology has provided many toxic entertainment ways for young individuals that cause many disadvantages. To illustrate, nowadays, many senior people not only reduce eye capability because of spending long hours playing video games but Use synonyms
also
have mental health problems Linking Words
such
as losing focus ability, lacking face-to-face interaction, and so on. Linking Words
Consequently
, Linking Words
museums
are a healthy form of amusement for younger individuals Use synonyms
instead
of playing video games, or surfing bad websites, to name just a few.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, several individuals believe that Linking Words
museums
should be aimed at education for the senior generation because of the display of many achievements in art, science, and history. Use synonyms
Hence
, they are a great environment to educate young visitors about these fields. Linking Words
For instance
, if a young person visits a historical museum, they will have an opportunity to observe historical remains and get more information about crucial milestones in history through paper or video. Linking Words
Thus
, they can learn history naturally and excitingly.
In conclusion, I think that Linking Words
museums
should combine both leisure and education functions because Use synonyms
museums
are not only where people can immerse themselves in the world of knowledge relaxedly without pressure from school and society but Use synonyms
also
where they entertain healthily when they have free time.Linking Words
Submitted by writingeilts on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
While the essay effectively addresses both sides of the argument, more balance is needed in terms of examples and explanations for both viewpoints. Equal development of ideas can enhance the strength of your argument.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that all points are consistently linked to the main topic sentence in each paragraph to maximize coherence. This will reinforce the logical flow of your argument.
introduction conclusion present
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the discussion and summarizing the main points.
supported main points
Main points are supported with examples, making the argument comprehensive and relevant, especially in discussing modern technology and its impact.
logical structure
The essay uses an appropriate logical structure, with paragraphs organized around specific ideas, facilitating a smooth reading experience.