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Band 7.5

Writing task : Giving lectures in auditoriums to large numbers of students is an old way of teaching. With the technology available today, everything should be done online. Do you agree or disagree

#lectures #auditoriums #numbers #students #technology
With the advent of the electronic revolution, all the spheres of teaching and learning processes have been changed recently. There are some arguments in favour of online teaching but
this
 essay is not in agreement with the statement and the reasons are explained below.
To begin
 with, a major drawback of remote teaching is the loss of control of the teacher. The lecturer is unable to give individualised attention to the pupils and, thereby, the relationship between them gets ruined.
This
 is a significant paradigm of academic success.
For instance
, during the pandemic time, all educational organisations conducted classes through the internet but they restored face-to-face classes immediately after the restrictions had been lifted, observing its limitations.
Hence
,
it is clear that
 online education is not a replacement for classroom-based teaching.
Furthermore
, the very expense, of setting up an infrastructure to promote academics via a web-based system, is grossly higher than using the existing facilities.
In addition
, students should
also
 be able to afford the cost of pre-requisites for the new method.
For example
, When the coronavirus infection was on the surge, Kerala tried to continue education through the Internet, but many of the students were not able to buy a mobile phone or a laptop to attend classes.
Finally
, the government had to fund them to continue the same.
On the other hand
, there are arguments against
this
 despite there being more pros. People say that it will be outdated to go to school or college in the future since technology will be cheaper soon and information will be at the fingertips. There is obvious evidence that the cost of the internet and electronic equipment is not soaring than that of some other things.
Although
 we can accept
this
, one still can say that offline teaching is irreplaceable.
To conclude
, some folks argue that teaching should be done via internet-assisted ways but I am of the opinion that classrooms are still a better place to learn. Whatever the technological advancement may be, there is a place for
this
 in the future too.
Submitted by krishnabalu1984 on

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coherence cohesion
Work on improving the logical flow of ideas between paragraphs by using more linking words and phrases. This will make your essay more cohesive and easier to follow.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph's main point is clear and well-supported with examples. Sometimes the main ideas can get a bit lost or muddled, affecting clarity.
task achievement
Try to develop your arguments in greater depth and detail. While you provide relevant examples, making your points more comprehensive will strengthen your task achievement.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, making it easy to understand your stance from the beginning.
task achievement
You provide relevant and specific examples to support your arguments, which adds depth to your essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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