Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisement tell us about new product that may improve our lives. Which view do you agree or disagree?

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There is an outlook asserting that advertising may increase consumerism culture.
In contrast
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, the other claims that commercial ads help customers to earn information
of
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about
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new products.
This
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essay,
however
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, represents the first view
due to
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people's lack of awareness of which goods they actually need or to be needed by advertisement. To illustrate how the crowd may be deceived by commercial ads is a bottle of mineral water, a thing which is able to be obtained for free, yet one uncritically has to buy in markets. The logic is more and more public is swept by
attractive-narrative
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attractive narrative
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commercial
Fix the agreement mistake
commercials
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, they may feel more need for the stuff. To be more creative, advertisements sometimes hire,
for instance
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, rising stars or other successful guys who objectively grab the public's attention.
Nonetheless
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, the artificial need by advertising has a high cost,
in particular
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for environmental sustainability. The mineral water packages are mostly created from plastic in which the bottle itself was designed for single use.
Consequently
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, the used bottle waste not only pollutes our nature but
also
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harms the marine ecosystem. Every manufacturer,
therefore
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, is supposed to be more responsible
in
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for
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both the product they have built up and the impact of their goods on the future of the earth. Commercial ads or whatever it is, in my perspective, should educate users on how to be more clever customers
instead
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of just addressing the crowd with their narrative to encourage people how spend money on the things that they do not really need.

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coherence cohesion
Consider providing a stronger conclusion that summarizes the key points of your argument.
task achievement
Include more specific examples or data to strengthen your argument that advertising creates unnecessary needs.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly and contributes clearly to the overall argument.
coherence cohesion
You effectively introduce both perspectives on advertising at the beginning of your essay.
task achievement
The argument about how advertising exploits celebrity endorsements aids in driving your point home effectively.
task achievement
The environmental impact example concerning plastic bottles is relevant and specific.
coherence cohesion
There is a clear introduction and conclusion outlining your stance on the topic.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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