It is sometimes said that people should be encouraged to get married before they are 30, as this is best both for the individual and for society. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people argue that for the

beneficial

Replace the word

benefit

show examples

of society and

individual

Fix the agreement mistake

individuals

show examples

, everyone should get married before

there

Correct your spelling

they are

show examples

30 but

other

Fix the agreement mistake

others

show examples

oppose

Correct pronoun usage

oppose it

show examples

. I somehow disagree with the notion, and I think that we should leave

this

Linking Words

decision

Change preposition

show examples

their personal choice. In the upcoming

paragraph

Add a comma

paragraph,

show examples

I will discuss both arguments.

Firstly

Linking Words

, if society

set

Wrong verb form

sets

show examples

the

Correct article usage

show examples

particular

age

Use synonyms

for marriage it will lead to

increase

Wrong verb form

increased

show examples

pressure on

young

Add an article

the young

show examples

generation to get a partner in

hurry

Add an article

a hurry

show examples

which may result in

wrong

Correct article usage

the wrong

show examples

decision

Fix the agreement mistake

decisions

show examples

For example

Linking Words

, in some

countries

Add a comma

countries,

show examples

there was

survey

Add an article

a survey

show examples

where some sort of

age

Use synonyms

was set for marriage have

high

Add an article

a high

show examples

rate of divorce because people make decisions without thinking properly.

Moreover

Linking Words

, today’s generation

focus

Change the verb form

focuses

show examples

more on their career and

want

Correct subject-verb agreement

wants

show examples

fulfill

Change the spelling

fulfil

show examples

their dreams on their own so that they do not have to depend on their partners but if they married at an early

age

Use synonyms

and their partner

Correct subject-verb agreement

does

show examples

not allow them to follow their dreams than their life will be wasted.

For example

Linking Words

mostly

Correct your spelling

most

show examples

husband

Fix the agreement mistake

husbands

show examples

who are from conservative families do not allow their

spouse

Fix the agreement mistake

spouses

show examples

to do jobs for which they did a lot of hard work in their entire life.

On the other hand

Linking Words

according to

Linking Words

the

society

Replace the word

societal

show examples

perspective

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

early marriage is that it will maintain

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

population growth across the country. As

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

it has been scientifically proven that with the increase in the

age

Use synonyms

group

Add a comma

group,

show examples

the chances of pregnancy decrease drastically. So, getting

Change preposition

into

show examples

relationship

Add an article

a relationship

the relationship

show examples

early

Add an article

an early

show examples

age

Use synonyms

increase the chance of getting pregnant.

Apart from

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

, if the couple is lucky and they successfully

delivered

Wrong verb form

deliver

show examples

their baby in their forties, the offspring will not get proper care from their parent because when the child

will be

Wrong verb form

show examples

a teenager the parents will get old. In conclusion, It should be advisable to the individual when to get married but the decision should be

there

Correct your spelling

their

show examples

own.

sainimuskaan387

Dec 28, 2024

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grammar

Try to proofread your essay to correct grammatical errors like 'there' instead of 'their' in 'before there 30.'

examples

Use concrete examples or evidence to support your points. For instance, you mention divorce rates; providing citations or specific studies could strengthen your argument.

structure

Make sure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that all sentences in the paragraph relate to it.

structure

Your essay includes an introduction and a conclusion, providing a nice framework for your argument.

content

You address both perspectives, showing a balanced approach to the question.

tone

The essay maintains a formal and appropriate tone for IELTS Writing Task 2.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
36
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

308 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Fertility
Maternal health
Psychological stability
Social maturity
Economic benefits
Shared responsibilities
Ancestral customs
Cultural imperatives
Personal development
Career establishment
Societal norms
Lifestyle choices
Divorce rates
Life decisions
Subjective wellbeing

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