Some people think technology development decreases crime, while others believe it actually encourages crime. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Nowadays, whether the rate of crime is increased by technology or reduced remains a controversial issue.

This

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essay will discuss both viewpoints and present my viewpoint on it. First of all, it is apparent that with the help of technological advancements, like crime-detecting cameras, it is quite possible to identify and track criminals in all locations.

For instance

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last

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year a group of thieves were trying to rob the bank though with masks, all were captured and sent to the police officers.

Therefore

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, by providing substantial evidence, AI cameras are able to reduce the corruption rate all over the world.

On the other hand

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, the proponents argue that it is almost challenging to reveal other offences like cybercrimes. Its prevalence is largely

due to

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the usage of social media and hi-tech nuances.

Furthermore

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, most technologically savvy illicit users try to fraud people by attracting them to their monopoly offering quite an excessive amount of money. As an example, in Azerbaijan , a diverse range of humans are suffering from

this

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problem. Specifically, most of them are offered to unveil the

last

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digits of the card account with the promise they will give a lot of financial rewards to the victims.

Consequently

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, having believed these attractive deals , sufferers mostly fall into traps. In conclusion,

although

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tech novelties are of high ubiquity and widespreadness to mitigate the corruption level,

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opine that owing to technological devices, various members of society are tricked through internet fraud and deceptive tactics aimed at misleading and exploiting their trust.

govhar.iMon Dec 30 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence. The second body paragraph could have started with a sentence clearly stating the argument against technology reducing crime.

task achievement

Provide a more detailed personal opinion in the conclusion, summarizing not just the opposing views but also clarifying your stance.

task achievement

The essay provides relevant examples to support the points made, such as the bank robbery and cybercrime in Azerbaijan.

coherence cohesion

Both sides of the argument are clearly presented, with a logical introduction and conclusion.

9
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5

6.5

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

254 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

deterrent
surveillance
forensic science
cybercrime
data theft
anonymity
illicit activities
law enforcement
jurisdictions
crime prevention

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