One of the consequences of improving medical care is that people are living longer and life expentancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweight the disdadvantages?
Over the years life expectancy has increased significantly thanks to science, but can the advantages of
this
development Linking Words
outweight
the disadvantages? In Correct your spelling
outweigh
this
essay, I am going to Linking Words
analise
and respond with my personal opinion to that question.
First of all, we have to name all the benefits that the increase Correct your spelling
analyse
of
the life Change preposition
in
expentancy
rate has Correct your spelling
expectancy
gived
us. Correct your spelling
given
Firstly
, one of the consequences that Linking Words
this
has, is that over the years Linking Words
scientifics
and doctors have discovered ways to cure Correct your spelling
scientists
people
Use synonyms
from
sicknesses that Change preposition
of
in
some point Change preposition
at
of
Change preposition
in
the
history were uncurable. Correct article usage
apply
For example
, in the Linking Words
19
century if someone had an open scar it was very probable that Correct your spelling
19th
it
would die from an infection, but Correct pronoun usage
they
he
she
in
nowadays Change preposition
apply
that is
not a problem. Linking Words
Therefore
, if we think about the future, maybe in a few years there will be a cure for cancer, Linking Words
Linking Words
that
is going to be another cause of why we Correct pronoun usage
which
people
are living longer.
Use synonyms
Nevertheless
, Linking Words
this
event has its drawbacks that society and especially governments have to Linking Words
made
up with solutions. Change the form of the verb
make
For instance
, many countries are having problems with their pension system, because there are more old than young Linking Words
people
. Concequently, the actual workers Use synonyms
enoughf
to finance the older population. Correct your spelling
enough
Also
, there are many Linking Words
grandphathers
that do not have a place to stay, because they do not have Correct your spelling
grandfathers
grandmothers
eny
family left, Correct your spelling
any
therefore
, governments should create places for them to stay even when they do not have the money to Linking Words
finace
it.
In conclusion, Correct your spelling
finance
although
the rise Linking Words
of
life Change preposition
in
expentancy
rate can have many flaws, the benefits that has and can give to Correct your spelling
expectancy
people
Use synonyms
outweight
every disadvantage. Correct your spelling
outweigh
outweighs
However
, Linking Words
this
Linking Words
do
not mean that, and as I said earlier, governments will have to create policies that can solve these new problems that might come.Change the verb form
does
Submitted by samuel.vicuna2003l on
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task achievement
To enhance task achievement, consider organizing your ideas more clearly and ensuring each point is fully developed and tied back to the main question.
coherence cohesion
Improve coherence and cohesion by ensuring each paragraph smoothly transitions to the next. Using more varied linking words could help.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame your argument well.
task achievement
You provide relevant examples to support the discussion, such as the development of medical cures over time.
task achievement
The essay makes a clear attempt to weigh both advantages and disadvantages, showing a balanced view.