Some people think spending a lot on birthdays and marriage celebration is a waste of money but others think it is important to the young people and the society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #birthdays #marriage #celebration #waste #money #society

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The debate over whether spending significant sums on birthdays and marriage

celebrations

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is wasteful or an essential part of cultural and social life is ongoing.

While

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some prioritize financial prudence, others highlight the joy and meaning

such

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events

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bring to individuals and communities.

This

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essay will explore

both

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perspectives before presenting my opinion. On the one hand, critics of extravagant

celebrations

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argue that financial management is paramount for young people. Undeniably, money plays a vital role in achieving long-term goals,

such

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as purchasing a home, pursuing higher education, or building an emergency fund. From

this

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viewpoint, spending excessively on short-lived

events

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can lead to financial instability and regret.

For example

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, a young couple who allocates their savings toward an elaborate wedding may struggle later with more pressing expenses.

Furthermore

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, developing sound financial habits early in life equips individuals to navigate unforeseen challenges,

thus

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fostering long-term stability.

Consequently

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, those who advocate for modest

celebrations

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believe that prioritizing future security over fleeting enjoyment is

both

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practical and responsible.

On the other hand

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, supporters of lavish

celebrations

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emphasize their value in creating lasting memories and strengthening social bonds. These milestones—

such

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as weddings and birthdays—are often seen as once-in-a-lifetime

events

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that deserve to be commemorated.

In addition

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to providing personal

fulfillment

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fulfilment

show examples

such

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gatherings can reinforce a sense of belonging and unity within families and communities.

For instance

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, a well-planned celebration can leave guests with cherished memories

while

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also

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honoring

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honouring

show examples

cultural traditions.

Moreover

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, celebrating significant occasions can serve as a reminder to appreciate life’s fleeting moments.

While

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it is important to remain mindful of financial constraints, I believe that

such

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events

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can bring immense joy and meaning to our lives, making them worthwhile investments when approached thoughtfully. In my view, the most effective approach lies in striking a balance between financial responsibility and the desire to celebrate life.

While

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it is essential to prepare for the future, it is equally important to live in the present and

savor

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savour

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special moments.

Celebrations

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need not be extravagant to be meaningful.

Instead

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, careful planning and budgeting can ensure that these occasions remain enjoyable without compromising financial stability. Ultimately, how one chooses to allocate resources should align with personal priorities, allowing for

both

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prudence and pleasure. In conclusion,

although

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there are compelling arguments on

both

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sides, I firmly believe that life’s milestones should be celebrated in a way that balances financial discipline with the pursuit of happiness. By adopting a balanced approach, individuals can

honor

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honour

show examples

their achievements and create lasting memories without jeopardizing their financial future.

Submitted by iigness05 on Thu Jan 02 2025

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coherence cohesion

To elevate your essay to a higher level, you might include more varied transitions between paragraphs to enhance flow. Additionally, integrating a broader range of vocabulary related to celebration and financial planning could further enrich your argument.

task achievement

While your essay provides a comprehensive analysis, consider developing the opposing viewpoint with a bit more depth to reinforce the balance of your discussion.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction effectively sets the stage by presenting both sides of the argument, drawing the reader into the debate.

task achievement

The essay clearly argues both viewpoints with relevant supporting examples, ensuring a balanced review.

coherence cohesion

You conclude your essay with a thoughtful personal opinion that synthesizes the preceding discussion, making your position clear.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

417 words

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Some people think spending a lot on birthdays and marriage celebration is a waste of money but others think it is important to the young people and the society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think an international car-free day is an effective way to reduce air pollution. Others think there are more effective ways to do this. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.