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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Fossil fuel is the main source of energy. In some countries, the use of alternative sources of energy is encouraged. Is this a positive or negative development? Trung

#fuel #source #energy #countries #alternative #sources #development #trung
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In the modern era, the world’s
energy
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 demand is increasing every year. Fossil fuel is very popular in many countries and it's becoming exhausted.
Therefore
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, scientists are looking for renewable
energy
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sources
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 and some cities have adopted them. In my view, a greener substitute is a positive trend. On the one hand, there are many objections to using alternative
energy
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.
First,
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this
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 type of
energy
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 is too expensive to produce and store, so
less developed
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less-developed
show examples
 natives are not applicable.
Second,
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power generated from renewable
sources
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 is not enough to meet the demands of most nations.
For example
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, Vietnam uses fossil
energy
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 as the main
energy
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 because it is in the development stage and
not
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does not
show examples
enough
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have enough
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 cost to satisfy the need.
On the other hand
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,
although
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 there are some restrictions, many countries advocate the use of power generated from renewable
sources
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. Alternative
energy
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 reduces the impact on the environment and has a low carbon footprint compared to fossil fuel.
Such
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 as wind and solar power, which will not worry about shortages in the future.
Additionally
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, renewable
energy
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 stimulates innovation and job creation. As governments invest in greener substitute infrastructure and technologies, new industries and employment opportunities emerge. In conclusion, the encouragement of alternative
energy
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sources
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 is driven by the need to address environmental concerns and promote sustainable development. By reducing carbon footprint and fostering economic growth.
Therefore
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, it is crucial for countries to continue investing in research and technology, and advocate policy that supports the widespread adoption of renewable
energy
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, ensuring a cleaner and more sustainable
energy
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 future.
Submitted by midden-02.tore on

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task achievement
To enhance task response, include more specific examples to support the arguments. This will make your essay more persuasive and demonstrate a thorough understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Improve clarity by addressing any abrupt transitions or sudden shifts in ideas. Ensure a smooth flow of information between paragraphs and avoid abrupt shifts from one point to another without clear connections.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, helping the reader understand the topic and the writer's stance. The concluding paragraph effectively summarizes the key points discussed.
task achievement
The essay provides a complete response to the task, exploring both the positive and negative aspects of using alternative energy sources. The writer's view is clearly stated and supported by arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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