Despite a large number of gyms, a sedentary lifestyle is gaining popularity in the contemporary world. What problems are associated with this? What solutions can you suggest? excitement

#gyms #lifestyle #popularity #world #excitement

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In the rapidly changing world, the

issue

Use synonyms

of being inactive exercise become a big deal even though each and every part of cities has a

gym

Use synonyms

centre. The balanced division of problems and solutions will be explored in

this

Linking Words

essay

along with

Linking Words

the conclusion in upcoming paragraphs. On the one hand, having a busy schedule of work on a daily basis creates a sedentary lifestyle among

people

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

means that to earn more money, individuals seem to be taking overtime in the workplace which leads to giving online food orders which is unhealthy

instead

Linking Words

of making dinner/breakfast athletics at home with family. If they don't have enough to prepare food for themselves,

this

Linking Words

could show that doing

exercises

Use synonyms

is impossible.

For example

Linking Words

;

according to

Linking Words

the Hindustan Times ( the Indian newspaper) more than 75% of

people

Use synonyms

are facing the problem of limited time to join a

gym

Use synonyms

Secondly

Linking Words

, insufficient opportunities for poor folks.

This

Linking Words

factor emphasizes that fees and membership are being taken by

gym

Use synonyms

owners before regular use of

gym

Use synonyms

tools with the demo. Not only

this

Linking Words

, clothes and shoes are

also

Linking Words

necessary as per as for safety which illustrates the result of not being able to go

gym

Use synonyms

and staying at home

due to

Linking Words

low earnings.

Thus

Linking Words

, these problems are my support for

this

Linking Words

statement about why are not a

gym

Use synonyms

and have

Add an article

show examples

sedentary lifestyle.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, healthy

education

Use synonyms

plays a crucial role in resolving

this

Linking Words

issue

Use synonyms

Change preposition

show examples

seminars.

This

Linking Words

solution means that unlike a job is important, physical

education

Use synonyms

makes

people

Use synonyms

smart like which small exercise they can use

while

Linking Words

working.

For example

Linking Words

, desk

exercises

Use synonyms

to as chair squats, desk pushups and long raises are simple

exercises

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that can strengthen and increase blood flow

along with

Linking Words

breathing fast and slowly making

people

Use synonyms

relax in a shorter time thanks to PE.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, being accountable for the proper functioning of the country's government has to unite multiple departments whether it is health,

education

Use synonyms

or transport. By government is obligated to solve the

issue

Use synonyms

of a sedentary lifestyle, and the authority should take responsibility for fitness centre fees for

people

Use synonyms

to make their citizens healthy and strong.

Therefore

Linking Words

, seminars at schools and in government are the main problem-solving to

this

Linking Words

trending

issue

Use synonyms

. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

owing to a shortage of time

people

Use synonyms

are unable to go

gym

Use synonyms

, thanks to school seminars on physical

education

Use synonyms

are able to do small

exercises

Use synonyms

like running, desk

exercises

Use synonyms

and breathing slowly and fast at the workplace which enhances the flow of blood in the body.

Submitted by preet01nav22 on Thu Jan 02 2025

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coherence cohesion

Your essay would benefit from a clearer structure. Try organizing your ideas into distinct paragraphs. Each paragraph should focus on one main idea or point.

task achievement

Some of your ideas were not fully developed. For instance, the explanation about gym fees and equipment could be expanded for clarity.

coherence cohesion

Ensure all sentences clearly contribute to your main argument or point. This will help maintain clarity and coherence. For instance, the transition from the problems to the solutions could be smoother.

task achievement

You provided relevant examples to support your points, such as the reference to Hindustan Times data and desk exercises. This strengthens your arguments.

coherence cohesion

You have effectively introduced and concluded your essay, providing a clear opening statement and a summarized conclusion.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

423 words

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Despite a large number of gyms, a sedentary lifestyle is gaining popularity in the contemporary world. What problems are associated with this? What solutions can you suggest? excitement

Word Count

Nowadays children are consuming too many sugar-based drinks. What are the reasons for and the solutions to this situation?

Some people say that parent should encourage their children to take part in organized group activities in their free time. others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own discuss both opinions and give your opinion ?

IELTS 17 Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Some people think that in order to deal with the problem of congestion in cities, privately owned vehicles should be banned in city centers, while others consider this to be an unrealistic solution. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

There is an idea, according to which that with more and more people using the internet and messaging, the communication in the real world will cease to exist.