In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sum of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
There is a widely held view that the transportation system has been advancing extensively, which sparks
community's
arguments about the allocation of funds, whether to establish a modern method by constructing new railway lines or focusing on existing ones. Correct article usage
the community's
Thus
, I Linking Words
wholheartedly
believe that prioritizing financial resources for existing public transport would be more effective because it will enhance the passenger's pleasure by making it more comfortable.
A high-speed railway line will make commuting efficient and more convenient since it will not require Correct your spelling
wholeheartedly
people
more hours waiting and transporting between two distant areas, particularly for individuals who reside far away from their workplaces and Use synonyms
they
have to get there on time. Correct pronoun usage
apply
For instance
, the fast train from Bandung to Jakarta in Indonesia only takes approximately one hour for more than 100 kilometres. Linking Words
Hence
, it would be an alternative method for those who regularly travel long distances, saving their precious time for other activities.
Linking Words
However
, enhancing other public transportation would appear to be a viable option, which Linking Words
also
involves other related facilities, Linking Words
such
as busways. Linking Words
This
can be done by improving the quality of facilities and services that it provides to the public, which can significantly increase passenger satisfaction and attract more Linking Words
people
to utilize mass transport rather than their personal Use synonyms
vehicle
. To illustrate, the development of bus stations, in terms of amenities and high-quality services in Indonesia, has driven Fix the agreement mistake
vehicles
people
to use buses as their regular transit. Use synonyms
This
is proven by the increase in the number of Linking Words
people
commuting by bus in recent years.
To summarize, implementing fast railway lines might bring benefits in terms of time, but it only affects some particular individuals, especially workers. Use synonyms
Otherwise
, improving other transportation would widely impact public satisfactionLinking Words
though
.Rephrase
apply
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task achievement
Your introduction clearly outlines the two views and offers your opinion. However, ensure better alignment between your opinion and the arguments presented in the body paragraphs to make your stance more evident throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph clearly supports the central argument with a topic sentence. The transition between discussing high-speed trains and improving existing transport could be smoother with linking phrases.
coherence cohesion
To improve logical structure, consider a balanced discussion where each view is given equal weight before providing your conclusion. This will present a more impartial examination before your opinion.
task achievement
The essay effectively includes specific examples, especially the mention of the Bandung to Jakarta train in Indonesia, which adds depth to your points.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that articulate your opinion effectively, giving a satisfactory closure to the discussion.
task achievement
The points made are relevant and support the task effectively, focusing on aspects like commuter satisfaction and the time efficiency of high-speed trains.