Today our communications, medicine and transport systems all depend on computer technology. Our reliance on computer technology in these fields has created a dangerous situation. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

In
this
new era of globalisation, technological advancement has been widespread. Inevitably, many multifaceted industries depend on artificial intelligence to conduct robust and holistic outcomes.
However
, the power of
this
technology
is infinite, no one knows the significance of the impact it could bring to humanity.
Therefore
, citizens all around the world have been concerned
to
Change preposition
about
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whether the implementation of
this
source of science could lead us to more harm than good. Ultimately,
this
strong automation is indispensable as it eases the workload of our labourers.
Firstly
,
this
progression has allowed society to connect with people all around the world via video telecommunications.
Moreover
, international interactions between leaders around the world ought to strengthen the
sociopolitic
Correct your spelling
sociopolitical
socio-political
sociopolitics
and economic state of the nation.
For example
, the Malaysian prime minister and the president of Turkiye had a session together via Skype to discuss the relationship
of
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between
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the two countries in terms of
export
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exports
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. Obviously,
this
was integral as the government could form alliances to collaborate synergies in the future.
On the other hand
, biotechnological advancement is substantial in incorporating the roles of biology,
technolgy
Correct your spelling
technology
, and engineering to fight medical drawbacks. To illustrate
this
, scientists are developing cures for rare hereditary diseases,
such
as haemophilia (a sickness that causes the
unability
Correct your spelling
inability
of a person to produce
sufficient
Add an article
a sufficient
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amount of platelets).
Nevertheless
, medicinal
technology
has produced
a
Remove the article
apply
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prevention by creating
micromolecules
Correct your spelling
macromolecules
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of artificial clotting mechanisms to replace non-functioning ones.
In addition
, without proper mechanisation,
this
cure will never be obtained. In conclusion,
technology
aligned with science and mechanics
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
stringent in producing effective results. Undoubtedly,
this
technology
is limitless, making it the responsibility of earthlings to not be inordinate, and use it wisely. Notably, the government should allocate more funds to the research and development (R&D) of micro and macro technological devices in order to create a safer mechanism for the utilisation by all age groups.
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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that each main point is directly related to the essay question to strengthen coherence and cohesion. This will enhance the logical flow.
Task Achievement
While the essay provides a balanced view, make sure each argument is clearly contrasted to improve clarity and completeness of response.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay presents a clear and well-structured introduction and conclusion, which frames the arguments effectively.
Task Achievement
The use of specific examples, like the Malaysian Prime Minister's interaction via Skype, strengthens the task achievement by providing relevant examples.

Your opinion

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If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • reliance
  • cybersecurity
  • over-reliance
  • digital divide
  • data breach
  • cyberbullying
  • diagnostic machines
  • electronic health records
  • automated vehicles
  • predictive maintenance
  • real-time monitoring
  • vulnerability
  • misinformation
  • hacking
  • efficiency
  • navigation systems
  • traditional skills
  • system failures
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