A friend is considering buying a house nearby, but you have decided to leave the area due to a rise in crime. Write a letter to your friend advising them not to move into the neighbourhood. In your letter: – Recommend that your friend not go ahead with the purchase – Give the reasons behind your decision to leave – Suggest possible alternative areas that you know

#friend #house #area #rise #crime #move #neighbourhood #purchase #decision #alternative #areas

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Dear James, It's been a

while

Linking Words

since we had not exchanged a word. Our common friend had told me that you were thinking of buying a house next door, but I bought a new apartment in another

area

Use synonyms

and would move there in the upcoming month. I think you're not aware of the miserable situation in

this

Linking Words

area

Use synonyms

. Let me tell you about the downside of

this

Linking Words

area

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

area

Use synonyms

is not safe to live in anymore especially for a single person like you because of the rise in crime.

Last

Linking Words

month, someone stole my wallet

while

Linking Words

shopping in the local market, and similar incidents have happened daily. That's why I suggest you reconsider buying a house here. I think you'd move to the west side of Bramley as its neighbourhood is safer, and I bought apartment number 7327A in the same

area

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

area

Use synonyms

is well known for its food market and has a massive mall in the city centre. If you need any help with purchasing the property there, feel free to ask me. Best Wishes, Aman

Submitted by immysandhu94 on Thu May 23 2024

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task achievement

Consider adding specific details about the crime rate, such as official statistics or more particular examples, to strengthen your argument against moving into the neighborhood.

coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph clearly presents a single idea. Some paragraphs could be more distinct and focused on one main point.

coherence cohesion

Add transitions between paragraphs to improve the logical flow. This helps guide the reader through your main points and enhances overall coherence.

task achievement

You have a suitable writing tone, friendly and concerned, which is appropriate for informing a friend about a serious matter.

coherence cohesion

Your greeting and closing are appropriate and provide a personal touch, which suits the context of writing to a friend.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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3
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

7 paragraphs

179 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

reconsider
unfortunate
incidents
safety concerns
deteriorating
neighborhood
increase in crime
personal experience
unsafe environment
alternatives
lower crime rates
amenities
community-oriented
recommend

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

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Some people say the main way to be happy in the life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

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Some people think that secondary schools should spend less time teaching traditional subjects like history and spend more time on teaching subjects like communication skills and business. Do you agree or disagree with this view?

Some people prefer to eat at food stands or restaurants. Other people prefer to prepare and eat food at home. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.