The given bar charts illustrate the amount of money in million euros which MG Entertainment profited from divergent categories in three European nations in 1997 and 2007.

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The bar charts depict MG Entertainment benefited in

million

Use synonyms

euros

Use synonyms

from variant sectors in Britain, France, Italy and Germany between 1997 and 2007.

Overall

Linking Words

, it is evident that Britain has the maximum profit in all the sectors

while

Linking Words

Germany had the lowest profit in millions except for Perfumes and Tennis racquets. It is illustrated that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

Britain was the leader in profit among all categories ranging from 170

Million

Use synonyms

euros

Use synonyms

for Photographic film and 155

million

Use synonyms

euros

Use synonyms

for Personal stereos.

However

Linking Words

, France was the second most profitable country in Europe for Photographic film, Toys and CDs with 165, 156 and 157 respectively.

Whereas

Linking Words

, Italy was the second economic sector in revenue for Perfumes, Personal stereos and

Tannis

Correct your spelling

Tennis

racquets with 147

million

Use synonyms

euros

Use synonyms

and 145

million

Use synonyms

euros

Use synonyms

depreciate

Replace the word

depreciation

show examples

Additionally

Linking Words

, France had the lowest figures

Change preposition

for

show examples

Perfumes, Tennis racquets and Personal stereos,

While

Linking Words

Germany had its lowest revenue in Photographic film, Toys and CDs.

Submitted by lovjotsandhu1 on Thu Jan 02 2025

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words million, euros with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

151 words

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The given bar charts illustrate the amount of money in million euros which MG Entertainment profited from divergent categories in three European nations in 1997 and 2007.

Some people believe that professionals such as doctors and engineers should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Today more people are travelling than ever before. Why is this the cause? What are the benefits of travelling for the traveler? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

Taking up some kind of sport is the best way for people to improve their social and psychological well-being. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective?