Some people think that sports involving violence, such as boxing and martial arts, should be banned from TV as well as from international sporting competitions. To what extent do you agree?Find essays with the same topic

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It is generally claimed by
people
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that some kinds of
sports
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,
such
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as boxing, karate and
marital
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martial
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arts in general directly
transfere
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transfer
violence and can lead to a chaotic society where
people
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portray intense aggressiveness.
Hence
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, those individuals concur that they should be banned from TV and,
therefore
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, from international
sports
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events. I wholeheartedly subscribe to the idea that
says
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apply
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we all are forced to live in a complex and imperfect reality.
Thus
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, I can only partly agree with
this
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statement. In the first place,
one
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must admit that
such
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activities as diverse martial arts are superior for physical and mental health, inasmuch as they can minimize the level of stress or anxiety for some who struggle with it.
In addition
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, spending energy and emotions on attending decent licensed clubs where
one
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can practice
such
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sports
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may exclude the thoughts of fighting in real life, clearly contributing to a lower level of crime. Apart from that,
such
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sports
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serve as
one
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of the best methods of protecting individuals in
unfavorable
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unfavourable
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situations, since our world is far from perfect and streets in many cities are not that safe;
one
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has a right to know how to defend themselves and their
children
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child
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in the event of a fight with a drunken person,
for example
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. For that reason, some colleges and schools tend to teach these
sports
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specifically to their students, so that they can protect themselves from eve-teasers or other criminal individuals. The
last
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argument is that a number of these
sports
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are used to provide training to the military forces to protect themselves in case of any attack.
Consequently
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, I assume that martial arts are
integral
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an integral
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part of our cruel world, and they deserve equal respect and should not be discriminated
in
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against in
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any way, nor should they be banned here or there.
However
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, not everyone can perceive all the information they get right, which can result in numerous problems in our society. Content watched by the public can have major
impacts
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impact
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on their
behaviors
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behaviours
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. What is more, in theory, violent
sports
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scenes can make
people
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, especially teenagers, become more aggressive in their mentality and patterns of
behavior
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behaviour
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. Worse still, more and more viewers might feel that violence and fighting are normal and acceptable concepts
,
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apply
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since even governments support the broadcasting of
this
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type of
shows
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show
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or give permission to arrange various kinds of said
sports
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events. Considering all of these arguments, I completely understand the position of those who would like the broadcasting of
such
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types of
sports
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as boxing or MMA to be banned from television and international tournaments.
Nevertheless
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, my opinion is the opposite;
people
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should consider
this
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issue from a wider perspective.
Submitted by yektaghandi.78 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph clearly supports the thesis statement with clear topic sentences. Some sections could benefit from slightly more precise topic sentences to aid reader comprehension.
task achievement
Broaden the range of vocabulary used and aim to use more specific adjectives and adverbs which might help in articulating a more nuanced argument. Certain parts of the essay repeat similar words or phrases, limiting the expressiveness of the writing.
task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt on both sides, providing a balanced view. It acknowledges both the merits and concerns of violent sports, reflecting a nuanced understanding.
coherence cohesion
Logical progression of ideas across paragraphs by presenting multiple points that support the thesis as well as counterarguments helps maintain a coherent structure.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clearly distinguished and appropriately frame the main argument and closure of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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