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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Fewer people are visiting shops to make their purchases. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

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Going shopping is currently losing its popularity with the introduction of various online websites. In
this
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 essay, I will delve into the topic, providing benefits and issues posed by
this
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 trend. On the one hand, there is a host of positive developments offered by online purchasing.
Firstly
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, E-commerce platforms often offer a broader range of products and competitive prices, making shopping more appealing.
For instance
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, there is a marketplace in the Russian Federation called Wildberries where people possess
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 vast selection of goods, so they can make thoughtful decisions.
Additionally
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, as people should not waste their time commuting to a store, they can enjoy pastime with families and friends.
On the other hand
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, the proliferation of advanced technologies in buying goods and services has introduced several challenges. One of them is the possibility of theft on the Internet. There is no denying the fact that not all payment systems are secured
as well as
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 salesmen are sincere.
Thus
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, thieves can easily steal customers’ money without any negative consequences.
Furthermore
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, the quality of the item which was bought cannot sometimes meet the necessary standards. As an illustration, many unscrupulous individuals sell fake iPhones worldwide to exploit high profits. The best way for them to bargain falsifications is to use the websites.
To sum up
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, I would like to outline the main advantages and disadvantages of buying things online rather than physically. To start with,
this
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 method decreases the physical contact between individuals, ensuring safe interactions.
Besides
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, it saves time to allocate it to more essential tasks. Controversy, there are
such
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 challenges as the Internet scam and goods’ imitations.

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task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples to further substantiate your points and strengthen the argument. This will enhance the overall depth of the essay.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and smoothly transitions to provide a more organized and coherent flow. This helps in maintaining reader interest and clarity.
task achievement
The essay effectively introduces the topic and provides a balanced discussion of both advantages and disadvantages of the trend, which is essential in addressing the task response.
task achievement
The use of examples such as 'Wildberries' in Russia adds specificity and relevance to the benefits of online shopping, enhancing the essay's credibility.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion efficiently summarizes the main points, providing a clear end to the discussion and reinforcing the key arguments presented.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • E-commerce
  • Brick-and-mortar stores
  • Convenience
  • Tactile experience
  • Social interactions
  • Carbon footprint
  • Environmental impact
  • Competitive prices
  • Economic disparities
  • Local economy
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