Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports faculties . Others , however say that this would have little effect on public health and other measures are required . Discuss both these views and give your own opinion .

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Public
health
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is said can be improved by adding the number of
sports
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facilities
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,
while
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others state that it would not affect that much and need more measurements. I strongly believe that it is indeed the easiest
way
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to increase them despite its little impact. In
this
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essay, I will explain why these arguments exist.
Firstly
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, it is true that building more
sports
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centres will attract
people
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to come there and do some exercise.
People
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can do many things like playing football, doing yoga, and maybe just jogging. They will feel that it will be a loss for them to not fully use the
facilities
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provided. So I think building
sports
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facilities
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will create urgency for
people
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using them as they surely know that exercise is essential for healthy lives.
Secondly
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, it is
also
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true that it has only little effect on them because increasing the number of
sports
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centres is not the only
way
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to enhance public
health
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. We can just control our eating habits and limit toxic foods. It is
also
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said that eating more vegetables and fruits will significantly improve your
health
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.
People
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will
also
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feel healthy enough by just doing exercise at home and maintaining their habits. Ultimately, I completely agree that building more
sports
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facilities
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is one
way
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to improve public
health
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, but it is definitely not the best
way
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. We should
also
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inform them to control their eating habits and stay away from unhealthy foods
such
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as fried and oily foods, sugar, and innards.
Submitted by josepharie31 on

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coherence cohesion
Consider structuring your essay in a clearer manner by explicitly stating each point in its respective paragraph. This could help improve the logical structure of your essay.
task achievement
Make sure that your arguments are supported with detailed examples or evidence. For instance, when discussing the effectiveness of sports facilities, include specific examples like statistical data or case studies.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your introduction clearly defines the scope and direction of the essay and your conclusion summarizes the key points discussed.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, providing a strong framework for your arguments.
task achievement
You make an effort to acknowledge both sides of the argument, which shows a balanced understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • promote
  • physical activity
  • improve
  • public health
  • opportunities
  • regular exercise
  • chronic diseases
  • obesity
  • diabetes
  • heart disease
  • community involvement
  • social interactions
  • education
  • healthy lifestyles
  • policies
  • healthy eating habits
  • access
  • limited
  • location
  • affordability
  • cultural barriers
  • holistic approach
  • strategies
  • interventions
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