IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The following table shows the number of people from five European nations living in each other’s countries in 2011.

The following table shows the number of people from five European nations living in each other’s countries in 2011.
#people #five #european #nations #other’s #countries
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The provided table chart
expresses
Verb problem
shows
show examples
 the
number
Use synonyms
 of individuals from different European
countries
Use synonyms
which
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
staying
Wrong verb form
stayed
show examples
 in each other's states in 2011. It can be seen from the graph that in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Germany
Use synonyms
live
Verb problem
there are
show examples
 numerous
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Italian citizens,
while
Linking Words
minimum
Change the article
a minimum
the minimum
show examples
number
Use synonyms
 of the Spanish
nations
Use synonyms
 live in the Polish.
Firstly
Linking Words
, in 2011 the quantity of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Italian inhabitants
live
Wrong verb form
living
show examples
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Germany
Use synonyms
,
significantly
Add a missing verb
was significantly
show examples
grather
Correct your spelling
greater
 than other
nations
Use synonyms
 which stay in other
countries
Use synonyms
;
however
Linking Words
,
total
Add an article
the total
show examples
number
Use synonyms
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Polish
people
Use synonyms
 importantly more than the total of each state.
The
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Germany
Use synonyms
 has various
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
nations
Use synonyms
live in
Wrong verb form
living
show examples
 there.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of
nations
Use synonyms
live
Wrong verb form
living
show examples
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Germany
Use synonyms
 contains 1.198.000
people
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, in the Polish live only 6.000
people
Use synonyms
 and most of them are Germanies which has 4.400 citizens
that live
Wrong verb form
living
show examples
 there.
By contrast
Linking Words
, Polish
people
Use synonyms
which
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 live in different
countries
Use synonyms
 contain 1.168.000,
while
Linking Words
 other
countries
Use synonyms
' individuals
lower
Add a missing verb
are lower
show examples
 than
million
Correct article usage
a million
show examples
.
Comparing
Wrong verb form
Compared
show examples
 to other
countries
Use synonyms
 the Spanish citizens are only 202.170
people
Use synonyms
 around the five European
countries
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by bellovanina97 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words number, countries, germany, nations, people with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: