IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

The process diagram details the steps by which liquid chocolate is produced from cocoa beans. Truc Linh

#process #steps #chocolate #cocoa #beans #truc #linh
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The diagram illustrates how liquid
chocolate
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 is produced from cocoa
beans
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 As is shown in the picture,
chocolate
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 production is an artificial process
liner
Correct your spelling
lined
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 to make sweet treats.It has 10 steps
start
Wrong verb form
starting
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 with
introduction
Add an article
the introduction
an introduction
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 of
origin
Correct article usage
the origin
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 and
Finish
Wrong verb form
Finishing
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 when the
chocolate
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 is liquid.
First,
Linking Words
cacao
Correct article usage
the cacao
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 tree is one of the most important
to
Change preposition
apply
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chocolate
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product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
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 and it
grown
Add a missing verb
is grown
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 in South America Africa,
Indonesia
Correct word choice
and Indonesia
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. When
this
Linking Words
 tree has ripe red pods,
worker
Fix the agreement mistake
workers
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harvested
Wrong verb form
harvest
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 the cocoa white kernel. After that, it is incubated in banana leaves to become fermented
beans
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 and
this
Linking Words
 process
helped
Wrong verb form
helps
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 the taste more natural and attractive. Next step,
beans
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 are dried in the sun until dry,
Linking Words
then
Correct word choice
and then
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 they
put
Add a missing verb
are put
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it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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in large bags. Go through the transportation process by truck, they take it to
factory
Correct article usage
the factory
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 and
beans
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roasted
Add a missing verb
are roasted
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 at 350 degrees. The maker divided it into two sides was crushed and filtered
outer
Correct article usage
the outer
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 shell.
Finally
Linking Words
, they pressed them into liquid form and got the expected results
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each step in the process is clearly marked and separated with appropriate linking words. This can help improve clarity and cohesion.
introduction conclusion present
A more detailed introduction and conclusion could provide a stronger sense of completeness and understanding of the process described.
task achievement
The description of each step could have more detail to completely achieve the task of explaining the chocolate production process.
task achievement
Add more specific examples or descriptions where possible to clearly demonstrate each part of the process.
logical structure
The process is described in a logical manner from the origin of cocoa beans to the production of liquid chocolate.
task achievement
The essay provides an adequate overview of the chocolate production process with clear mention of key steps.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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