Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
Many individuals believe that beating
someone
is creating something fun and increasing a sense of competition. Use synonyms
Otherwise
, others are thinking that dealing with a condition is the best choice. I totally agree with Linking Words
people
who are trying to compete with each other because it can create several positive views.
Rivalry is one of the conditions that can create a sense of achievement in Use synonyms
someone
if he or she can beat other Use synonyms
people
. Use synonyms
Additionally
, competition makes individuals try to do their best to aim for something beneficial. Linking Words
For example
, staff tend to increase their skills to get a promotion from their boss. Linking Words
Moreover
, students will improve their knowledge by following a lot of courses outside class so that they can reach the highest rank in their school. Linking Words
Furthermore
, Linking Words
this
circumstance is common for Linking Words
people
at work, at school, or even on a daily basis because it can boost the spirit and adrenaline.
Use synonyms
However
, contesting is not good at all, there is one more thing that humans must be more cooperate with the conditions. Obviously, conflict can leverage other problems that cannot be handled with emotion. Linking Words
For example
, negative emotion Linking Words
such
as anger and frustration from beating Linking Words
someone
leads to anxiety so Use synonyms
people
tend to lower their expectations and become stressed. Particularly, Use synonyms
this
is not good for individuals who are suffering from mental health problems. In the end, dealing with Linking Words
someone
and a situation is the best way to stay away from a conflict.
In conclusion, I believe that competition is the best choice for Use synonyms
people
to beat Use synonyms
someone
if they use the power in positive ways Use synonyms
such
as to reach their goals. Sometimes, humans must be sincere enough and cooperate to handle negative feelings of rivalry because it can lead to many problems Linking Words
such
as frustration, anxiety, and so on.Linking Words
Submitted by irhamtaufiqurrahman on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
introduction conclusion present
Introduce both sides of the argument more clearly in the introduction. While you've mentioned them, elaborating slightly more will make your opening stronger.
logical structure
Ensure each paragraph follows logically from the other. Consider using more signposting language, such as 'On the other hand', 'Furthermore', and 'In addition'.
supported main points
While you have good examples, they could be more detailed to better illustrate your points and arguments.
complete response
Your essay discusses both sides of the topic effectively and arrives at a personal opinion, which shows a clear understanding of the task.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction and conclusion are present, providing a good start and a well-rounded finish to your essay.
clear comprehensive ideas
You've used a variety of sentence structures to explain your points, demonstrating your ability to use English flexibly.