IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The threat of nuclear weapons maintains world peace. Nuclear power provides cheap and clean energy. The benefits of nuclear technology far outweigh the disadvantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

#threat #weapons #world #peace #power #energy #technology
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Some
people
Use synonyms
 argue that the role of nuclear weapons
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 been beneficial for maintaining the peace in the world
such
Linking Words
 as providing affordable and
cleaning
Replace the word
clean
show examples
 energy for society. I highly disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement and believe that
disadvantages
Correct article usage
the disadvantages
show examples
 outweigh the benefits of nuclear technology.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, there are several reasons why nuclear weapons could bring drawbacks
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 our population. One of the reasons is encouraging unsafety regions for civilisation
due to
Linking Words
 constant fear of attack from
country
Add an article
a country
the country
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 that possessed the
weapon
Use synonyms
. North
Korea
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,
for example
Linking Words
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
has been
ongoing
Add an article
an ongoing
show examples
 threat
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 South
Korea
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's
people
Use synonyms
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
 nuclear testing, looking back at conflict histories between both countries in the past.
Additionally
Linking Words
, North
Korea
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 has been taking advantage
for
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of
show examples
 every issue that
occur
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occurs
show examples
 to launch their nuclear
weapon
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 to intimidate South
Korea
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's government.
Consequently
Linking Words
, the possession of
nuclear
Add an article
a nuclear
show examples
Use synonyms
weapon
Fix the agreement mistake
weapons
show examples
 may affect
to
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apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 comfort of civilisation's
live
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lives
show examples
 because of the
treat
Correct your spelling
threat
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 of the
danger
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dangerous
show examples
weapon
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 that could be launched anytime without their knowledge. The other reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
this
Linking Words
 issue is
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 possibility of destruction
causing
Wrong verb form
caused
show examples
 by nuclear
power
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such
Linking Words
 as health problems and environmental
disaster
Fix the agreement mistake
disasters
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.
This
Linking Words
 is because it has been some accidents
happened
Wrong verb form
happen
show examples
due to
Linking Words
 the ownership of nuclear
power
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.
For instance
Linking Words
,
In
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apply
show examples
Japan several years ago experienced a huge explosion
due to
Linking Words
 nuclear technology.
Moreover
Linking Words
, these incidents had caused damage to
environment
Add an article
the environment
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 and injured hundreds of
people
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.
As a result
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nuclear
power
Use synonyms
 was not only disrupting our planet but
also
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
's
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
 some believe that nuclear
power
Use synonyms
 could benefit
for
Change preposition
from
show examples
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
cheap and clean energy,
this
Linking Words
power
Use synonyms
 could lead to disadvantages
such
Linking Words
 as fear of unsafety countries and disruption for our planet. In my opinion, I believe that the drawbacks of nuclear technology are greater than the benefits.
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complete response
Make sure to clearly state your stance in the introduction and consistently develop your argument throughout the essay.
supported main points
Strengthen your main points by providing more detailed examples and evidence to support your arguments.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction effectively sets the context and presents a clear position on the issue.
introduction conclusion present
The essay concludes with a clear summary of your opinion and stance.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Deterrence
  • Mutually assured destruction
  • Greenhouse gases
  • Cost-effective
  • Radiation therapy
  • Proliferation
  • Rogue states
  • Radioactive waste disposal
  • Catastrophic accidents
  • Climate change
What to do next:
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