Many believe that modern technology has brought people together, but others say that it has driven us apart. Discuss both viewpoints and give your own opinion.

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There are split opinions on the evolution of technology. Some believe that tech is the only reason that has brought us together

while

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other says it has created a high concrete wall between us. In

this

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essay, I will outline why I believe tech has brought human life

together with

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more detail in the conclusion. First and foremost, digital technology enhanced communication systems like never before. Interacting platforms like the World Wide Web, social media, playing live games and video conferencing software

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

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brought people together from any corner of the world.

For example

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, it become easier to perform international meetings using Zoom call or Google Meet software.

This

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is not only limited to voice calls but have face-to-face live connections.

Moreover

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, it can save valuable time

as well as

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money by decreasing travel overseas.

On the other hand

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, an office could disappear in the future.

This

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can be replaced with a virtual online office creating a void of personal interaction. So, because of the rise of telecommunication, there will be a lack of emotional connection. To explain

this

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further

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, before

this

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tech era, people like to visit each other's houses to have a coffee and spend time creating bonds between them. Surpassing,

this

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situation it is

also

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seen that

due to

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enormous growth in industrialization, skilled workers are now been replaced with hi-tech machinery to increase production.

To conclude

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and give my opinion, I would say technology has raised our lifestyle by giving a hand in our day-to-day life. It enhances daily activities more easily like communicating with our friends and colleagues in today's world.

While

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some may argue that it affects an individual relationship.

This

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can be prevented by using it in an effective manner.

Submitted by Richard on Fri Jan 10 2025

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Task Achievement

Ensure all points in the introduction are addressed in the body of the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion

Diversify the structure of your sentences to enhance readability and engagement.

Task Achievement

Provide more specific examples to support your arguments.

Task Achievement

The essay effectively presents both viewpoints on the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion

Ideas are clearly segmented into paragraphs.

11
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

287 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

connectivity
communicate
social media
virtual meetings
global community
isolation
distract
face-to-face interaction
personal connections
dependency
technology addiction
digital divide

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