In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
In many nations, it is supposed that a huge amount of money should be invested in erecting new high-speed trains connecting cities. Other opponents believe that the government should allocate their budget to upgrade the public transportation systems which are currently operated. The essay will discuss both perspectives and I will argue why the latter point of view ought to be supported.
On the one hand, with the increasing demand for commuting, constructing new bullet trains should be prioritized. Because once the commuting time is shortened, commuters will save much time which might be used to solve more tasks at work.
Moreover
, students will have much spare time to do revision or simply socialize with their friends before the lessons start. Linking Words
In addition
to that, holidaymakers will find it easy and convenient to plan more trips to discover new lands and broaden their horizons. Linking Words
In contrast
, there might be some routes successfully operated. It means the others might be unprofitable which puts a great financial burden on the government.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, existing buses and undergrounds ought to be considered getting upgraded. Linking Words
Firstly
, employees are familiar with travelling by these means of transportation to get to their workplace. If these were made to be more advanced, they would be run effectively. It means passengers no longer face overcrowded or time-consuming states. Sitting on these means comfortably, they can deal with much job-related work. Linking Words
Secondly
, visitors tend to choose to travel by bus over by train as they can go sightseeing at a cheap price.
From my perspective, taxes getting from residents should be used properly so the government should spend a part upgrading the present buses and undergrounds. Since it takes the authority less money to make them better compared to the proposal of building the new ones. And the spare money might be injected into other sectors including education or public health care.
In conclusion, Linking Words
although
the idea of building up new high-speed rails is advocated because of their time-saving and efficient features, I still hold a firm belief that the current systems are worth getting invested in as they play a more crucial role in people's daily lives.Linking Words
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coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which helps in guiding the reader smoothly from start to finish. However, some ideas could be connected more effectively to enhance the logical flow.
task achievement
Ensure that all points are equally developed, and more specific examples could help strengthen your arguments. The essay sometimes lacks concrete examples which could provide stronger support for your points.
coherence cohesion
The introduction sets up the debate effectively and states your opinion clearly, providing a strong start to the essay.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion is nicely tied back to the main points discussed, reinforcing your viewpoint in a compelling manner.
task achievement
Your arguments are well-developed and show a good understanding of both sides of the issue, displaying a balance in perspectives.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.