Some people believe the purpose of education is to make people useful to society. Others believe it is to prepare them to achieve their ambitions. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #purpose #education #society #ambitions

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Education

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plays a crucial role in shaping

individuals

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and societies.

However

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, there is a debate over the main purpose of

education

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: some people believe its primary goal is to make

individuals

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useful to

society

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while

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others argue that it should focus on helping

individuals

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achieve their personal ambitions.

Both

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perspectives offer valuable insights, and I will discuss

both

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before providing my own opinion. On one hand, some people think the main purpose of

education

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is to prepare students to contribute positively to

society

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According to

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this

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view,

education

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should equip people with the skills and knowledge needed for the workforce,

such

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as technical expertise or the ability to communicate effectively. By focusing on societal needs,

education

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helps to create productive citizens who can support economic growth, improve communities, and solve social problems.

For example

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, training in areas like healthcare, engineering, and teaching directly benefits

society

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by providing essential services.

On the other hand

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, there are those who believe

education

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should primarily help

individuals

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achieve their personal ambitions.

This

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view emphasizes the importance of personal development, creativity, and

self-fulfillment

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self-fulfilment

show examples

Education

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is seen as a tool to help

individuals

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discover their talents, pursue their passions, and build careers that align with their interests.

For example

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, students who are passionate about the arts or entrepreneurship may not be seeking to serve societal needs directly but

instead

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aim to achieve personal success and satisfaction. In my opinion,

education

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should strike a balance between these two views.

While

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it is important to provide students with the skills necessary to contribute to

society

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, it is equally important to nurture their individual ambitions. A well-rounded

education

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system can help

individuals

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find their passions

while

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also

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preparing them to be responsible and productive members of

society

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. In conclusion,

both

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views on the purpose of

education

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are valid.

Education

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should aim to serve

both

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societal needs and personal growth, ensuring that

individuals

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can contribute meaningfully to the world

while

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also

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achieving their own goals.

Submitted by muzun0612 on Sat Jan 11 2025

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Coherence & Cohesion

To enhance coherence and cohesion, ensure seamless transitions between different viewpoints. Use linking words and phrases to better connect the ideas within paragraphs and between them.

Task Achievement

Consider providing more specific examples or case studies to strengthen the arguments you present. This will make the essay more compelling and relatable.

Task Achievement

Substantiate your assertions with well-defined examples. This could include statistics, personal anecdotes, or notable events in the related fields.

Task Achievement

The essay provides a thorough response to the task, discussing both perspectives on the purpose of education and providing a balanced personal opinion.

Coherence & Cohesion

The introduction sets the stage well, outlining the key debate and preparing the reader for the discussion.

Coherence & Cohesion

The conclusion effectively sums up the discussion and reiterates the balanced view on education’s purpose, bringing closure to the essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

325 words

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Some people believe the purpose of education is to make people useful to society. Others believe it is to prepare them to achieve their ambitions. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people no longer read newspapers or watch TV news programmes. Instead they get news about the world from the Internet. Is this a positive or negative development?

It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children?

When a new town is planned, it is more important to Public Park and sports facilities than shopping centres for people to spend their time in. To what extent do you agree or disagree.